What should I do from now on with my husband whose disgust won't go away

I'm sorry for Tomo-san's heartache.

Your husband has admitted that he went to such a store, so that's fine. It is also true that from the wife's point of view, no matter what the circumstances are, unforgivable. As a man, I know that even if I make various excuses, it is difficult to accept them.

This time, the anger in my heart was expressed in this way, so I wonder what I want to do in the future. Whether they will continue to blame their husband or break up quickly, at present, I think they are reflecting on their wife's strong feelings, but there is probably no approach from the husband. That's because I don't know what to do.

The children are also growing steadily. It's probably also the cutest time right now. I think kids want a dad too.
Naturally, if your husband doesn't like such a store too much, I don't think he'll ever go to such a store again. Also, it is natural for anyone to write sentences written on business cards. That's because the other party is also in business.

Well, after all, in the end, Tomosan just decides whether to forgive or not to forgive. I've probably conveyed what I wanted to say, so it's not a problem that time will solve the rest. It will last forever as long as you don't change your mind. What is this suffering and pain.

You are free to do whatever you want, but if you don't have any feelings of liking left, you have no choice but to make such a choice, and if there is even a slight amount of love left, you have no choice but to take a step forward in the direction of forgiveness. All that's left is courage to make that decision.

~P.S. Reply~
unforgivable. I understand that feeling, but in the end, your own suffering will only increase, and there will be no solution.
Of course, it's not your fault either, so I don't have to be blamed by everyone. However, it will only be difficult if it is not settled at some point. If it continues, it will cause the following. Naturally, there will be no good results, so worries will increase again.
Forgiveness may be an issue.

~P.S.: reply~
Forgiving is different from putting up with it and humiliating. In contrast to the fact that patience is a temporary pause from attacking, humiliation means forgiveness. The more serious the problem, the less likely it is that there is no other way to resolve it other than forgiveness.

Hello, nice to meet you

I am being asked, “What should I do in the future?”
If you want to get through with the same direction of not forgiving your husband, as before, then I have no way to stop it. If you can't forgive “my mother-in-law crying and apologizing” or saying “I'm sorry and regret it,” then that's probably your decision.

“My husband doesn't have an approach to repairing our relationship. It is said, “They are people waiting for instructions, and they don't have the ability to act to solve things on their own.” From the disclosure of the “business card,” it is said that “my husband went on a long business trip soon after that,” but the third party doesn't know how many days and how many discussions have taken place since this was discovered.

There are almost no days open (about a week), so I don't know if there haven't been many discussions, or if “repairs” have not been carried out even after two or three months of discussions. If it's the former, I think we haven't had enough discussions yet, and if it's the latter, let's determine that the problem is becoming serious on both your husband's side and yours.

When I went back to the beginning, I was asked, “What should I do in the future?” Even though it's natural to ask your husband for apology and remorse, shouldn't you also ask your own questions about “what should happen?”

On the one hand, the reason “repair” is not being done may be the cause that your husband is a “person waiting for instructions” and has no “ability to act,” and there is no possibility that “repair” cannot be achieved due to repeated stubbornness and not accepting that remorse or apology.

People have different views on ethics.
You may not be able to accept “that kind of business.”
However, even in this Hasunoha, there are people who are “in that kind of business” and ask troubling questions. That person has their own circumstances. I think that person is equal as a person who lives while struggling.

Also, if it were true that “I was taken by my boss,” there would have been aspects where I couldn't do it. In the midst of an ambiguous boundary between work and the rest, I think there are times when we are forced to make involuntary choices.

Above all, the daughter is watching her parents
Shouldn't showing that you're on good terms be prioritized above all else

appending
“Is it okay to let another daughter do that?” is “a story about acknowledging an occupation without approval” (character limit)

I was shocked.
However, even countries that have killed each other in war can become allies.
To that end, forgiving past mistakes is necessary.
As long as the store my husband went to is legal, it is difficult for a monk who is a third party to criticize it.
Infectious disease risks can also be found elsewhere.
In the end, it's a battle against your “somehow disgusting” values.
No matter how much you blame the past, the past won't change.
So what do you want your husband to do in the future? There is also a possibility that any request made for the future can be fulfilled.
Why don't you think about what your husband would be able to convince you of?
I think peace negotiations are necessary for future peace.
Also, according to the monk's precepts, it's not good to talk about other people's mistakes. This is a monk's rule, so the general public doesn't need to follow it, but if you tell your relatives about your husband's mistakes, it may be an act of “nobody benefits.”
Whether a husband's behavior falls under an affair is unclear, but of course infidelity is also bad according to the precepts.
Either way, if you can't let the past go to the water, why not discuss what to do with your marital relationship in the future?
We won't get divorced for the sake of our children, but let's end our romantic relationship (a new relationship with each other OK) or something.
“Anger destroys peace”, “Who would be happy with this anger?” Let's not forget that calm point of view.

I have an only daughter and a wife, and I think it's a normal happy family.
If I replace it with myself, it means that my daughter found a card from a male prostitute in my wife's bag, right?
Well, that makes me feel disgusted. did you breastfeed with that breast when you had milk with a man you don't know!? I think, so I don't think it's reasonable to think about forgiving them about once.

On top of that, I thought there were a few elements that made it difficult to solve, so I'll break it down.
First point: Time has passed, and the “state of being angry with the other person” has become “normal.”
Second point: Tomo herself thinks her daughter needs a father.
Point 3: > Can you say go to Pinsaro! I yelled. So, it's a completely correct argument, but the point is that there is no going back since abandoning the method of “making it something you haven't seen” because of this.
This area seems to be the core of the problem.

I'm going back to the beginning...
> My husband is a sincere and good-natured person.
It's written in the present tense, so it's fine that Tomo-san still thinks her husband is a sincere person, right?
> Dad's bag
Being able to call him dad saved me.

I thought that I wouldn't lie even if I was a person waiting for instructions from a no-nonsense principle, but I was very, very shocked that my virtues were destroyed.
The case of my parents and mother-in-law is a separate case, but it was difficult.

It's not great, but it's hard to say forgive.

But still.
Even so, “monks” hate “suffering,” and I want everyone to find “ease.”

From here on, it's an “ego” as a “monk” that Tomo, who has had a hard time, wants him not to suffer any more.

First, what does your daughter think?
If I was hurt that my parents were on bad terms even though I had just found the card at that time, I think I would have to shelve myself “as a parent.”

and
> I enjoyed every event with my family, and it was a normal, happy family.
The meal was delicious, the present we got, the place we went together... Please also “remember” things you were happy about.
> Face off Ikumen
I feel that the appearance of my husband worrying about his children is what it is. Please accept the good side as a good side.

On top of that, why don't you consider a feasible condition that you can forgive if this is the case?
If you tell them about it and the other person does it “in good faith,” wouldn't you be able to forgive them at that time?