I'm the worst grandson (daughter).

A Buddhist altar, table, or photo is fine, so sit right in front of them and apologize honestly and politely right now.
It would be a pity for grandma if her existence was denied just because she lost her body.
Even though they say they can't see it anymore.
Even though they say they can't see it anymore.

＞
A few years ago I became depressed due to stress at work, quit that job, and rested at home for a while
＞
You've been having a hard time for the past few years. Depression is not a disease with obvious symptoms, so it's hard for people around you to understand your pain. But I think your grandmother and mother were on your side and saw how you were suffering from depression. I think your grandmother and mother understand your difficult situation.

Generally speaking, we return the favor to the favor we receive. If you cause trouble, it means filling in the blanks and making amends.

In Buddhism, there is a way of thinking called “conversion.” Conversion is the act of transferring the results obtained by oneself through ascetic practice and virtue for others. It's hard to completely return the favor to your grandparents and parents while they're still alive. What you can't do is give back to your children and grandchildren, and society as a whole.
But for the time being, let's put our hands together with all our heart and convey words of apology to our grandmother, as there is already an answer from the resident teacher, whether it's a Buddhist altar or a tomb. (If you don't want people around you to listen to your words, remember that in your heart.)

When apologizing to your mother, consider these circumstances, how much your mother understands your condition and how close she is, and apologize by watching the timing. If you are an insensitive person who is “encouraged” or “taunted” under high pressure, it may be safer to wait a while until your depression becomes lighter. I think it would be nice if your mother could make up for it little by little after your health has recovered.

It may be difficult to sort out your feelings, but please relax your mind and body first, and then make an effort to recuperate.

First of all, how is your current physical condition

It is said that the old woman has passed away, but if you have a tomb, in front of the grave; if you have a Buddhist altar at home, in front of the Buddhist altar; if you don't have it, you can go to a place where there is nothing; please remember your grandmother from the bottom of your heart and apologize

Let me tell you a little bit about me
I had rabbits when I was little, and their name was “Zex.” After that, I'll call it “him.” He was very friendly from the time he came home and quickly became part of the family

I went back to my father's house in the summer, about 3 years later. It's a seaside village, so I took him to play in the ocean, finished lunch while leading him to the sandy beach, then went back to the car and went back to my father's parents' house
When I put it in the cage and put it in the car, I had no doubt that I was tired of playing because I was sluggish. I still regret that time for a long time

When I got home and opened his cage, he never moved again, wouldn't open his eyes, and was dehydrated.
Why couldn't I doubt that there was such a possibility for me at the time, why wasn't I able to give water more often, and of course why...
I still regret it for a long time, and this regret will never go away; I think I killed him
I think that is the work I carry on my back and that I must continue to carry on my back from now on

Karma is a crime we have committed. It is a crime that has been committed from the past to the present to the future, and is likely to be committed in the future

In the sutras called “Kō Kōsei,” we repent to the Buddha for countless sins “from the endless past, going round and up to this body.” And I swear “I will forever refuse these sins and never make them again”

However, humans are weak creatures. No matter how careful you are, there are times when you hurt people, and there are times when demons stab you

Please confess your sins first and repent firmly
I also have days spent with him who bowed down and wouldn't come back, but I have to keep on repenting

Even if you apologize, your sense of regret may not go away, and you can't even look your grandmother in the eye and apologize
But even so, please apologize, please repent, and live strong by holding that it is our own work

You really had a hard time.

Your grandmother must be happy with you for thinking so.

Your mother should have understood it too.

I don't care about it for my children or for my grandchildren, and it's also a joy to do my best.

It shouldn't have been a big deal.

It must have been more painful to see you in pain.

Good, I was able to notice it, and I thought so far.

It's great.

One day, your mother told you something like that, so why don't you just say sorry for it?

It's okay, your grandmother protects you from the Buddha's country and is happy that you have a kind heart.

First, let's understand the nature of stress.
It's “never finished.”
Right now, reality is “not” right in front of me.
You had the illusion that something “not” was continuously “there.” That is probably still the case today.
Everyone is like that, not just you. Assume that something “exists” that isn't right in front of you right now.
This is the root of stress, hesitation, and worry.
What has already occurred and hasn't happened is projected (caused) on the display of your mind as if it had been around for a long time, and arrange critics who evaluate it very badly in the studio in your mind.
Critics who blame themselves.
Please carefully determine its true identity.
Who is blaming you for saying the worst things about you?
It should be your own.
I did something bad to my grandma, and even now, I feel embarrassed and dragged on for a long time.
I can't live brightly today.
I'm throwing myself into a swamp of negative hell.
Who's doing that?
Is that grandma? Is that the person who did bad things at work? no.
You are yourself.
Everyone is responsible for their own worries and suffering in life. Everyone has their own.
Try throwing away your own story once and for all.
It was like this because I did that.
I'm not good at it
Me, me, my fault.
I'm the worst, I'm the worst, and I'm sure I'll regret it for a long time to come.
Who is making that story?
It's all yours, too.
Buddhism is my story, a way of life that escapes from the delusional hell created by myself.
Overlay your thoughts on facts and add them. As a result, the facts are distorted.
You are the one who scoops yourself up from there.
Throw away all your stories.
That's where I can talk to my real grandmother for the first time. I know what to do.
You're only talking to the grandma inside of you.
If you want to hear a more authentic voice, let go of the story you've always held on to your grandmother.
There, you'll be able to talk the truth with your grandmother.
“I'm sure grandma is like this” within you is your thought. your own unique idea.
It's about having that awareness.
You are filled with even greater love.