I want to change my family temple

[Question] Can I move my grandfather/grandmother from my family temple to another temple?

Consultant (me): W family, mother's parents' house: T family.

Grandfather (mother's father), grandmother (mother's mother), uncle A (mother's eldest brother), and aunt A (uncle A's wife) are in the temple on the maternal side. (all T family)
Uncle B has recently passed away (mother's second brother). Uncle B is single and has no children. We lived together until my grandmother passed away, so I was thinking about an ossuary at this temple, but since this temple interferes with family matters and money, my mother said she would like to take this opportunity to change temples.

Uncle A and Aunt A have 2 children, and their second son has taken over the grave for the time being.
However, it seems that the memorial service has not been completed due to various circumstances.
Having said that, Uncle A and Aunt A have children, so I would like them to think about the future together.

So I'm thinking about moving my grandfather, grandmother, and uncle B to the W family temple.
Currently, my father is sleeping in the W family's grave.
When I talked to the W family temple, they said that there was no problem putting Uncle B into the W family's grave. (I mean because it's my mother and brother)

Uncle B has been taking care of my grandmother for a long time, so I want to put her in the same grave. The temple has not yet confirmed whether it is OK to put my grandfather and grandmother in the W family's grave.

Incidentally, the denominations of the W family and the T family are different, but it seems that W family temples accept them regardless of denomination.

Thinking about the future, Grandmother and Uncle B are going to ask for a permanent memorial service. My grandfather has completed a 50-year memorial service.

Under the above circumstances, would it be OK to move only my grandfather/grandmother from my current grave to the W family's grave? Of course, if costs are to be incurred, we intend to respond.

However, I requested the memorial service until the 49th from my mother's house at the temple of the family temple.
I'm worried about what to do with the ossuary after that.

The chief priest of the T family temple is a bit cranky and a clergyman, but he is severe about money, so I'm worried that he won't be able to accept it easily.

Thank you so much for your advice.

4 Zen Responses

You are free to change temples

Was it Section 22 of the Constitution, freedom of religion is guaranteed. The Constitution is the supreme law of Japan, so there is no way anything stronger than that is written in the Religious Corporation Law, and even if one religious corporation (temple) independently says “you must not quit our parishioners” or “if you stop, give one million yen”, etc., it has no effect.
It is completely personal, at home, and for the parishioners to leave that temple.
It's enough just to say “stop.” Recently, there are many examples where they somehow stop making noise and disappear spontaneously, ignoring requests for donations, etc., and ending in a form.
Stop, don't worry about being thrown around with offerings. You can ignore it. However, as good manners, they gave some donations at the end and said, “Thank you so much for your support so far. It would be cooler to say “I'm going to stop it.”
If you stop being a parishioner, if there are graves, bones, or placards in a temple, you will take them out of that temple and carry them or dispose of them yourself.
At that time, too, you can ask the temple for an appropriate response. This also needs to be appropriate, but to what extent it is “appropriate” can be found on the Seikyo-ji Temple website https://seikyoji.jimdofree.com/
It is posted on “What is a memorial service?” It's also written in, but well, it's probably within the scope of social common sense and rituals.
The only thing you need to stop is your own free will, but you only need the other temple's approval when entering a new temple. It's already done, so there should be no problem.
　

There is also a method called bone splitting.

What is the temple of the T family
Because Mr. A's second son is going out with
When it comes to transferring all of those grandparents' bones to another temple
Lumps may remain.

Keep Mr. B in secret
“Whichever tomb I go into
“I want to put in my grandparents' bones separately.”
Speaking of because my mother wants it
The temple of the T family too
I don't think I would say no.

You can also leave the procedure to an administrative scrivener or judicial scrivener

Tsubame-sama

Formally, it is possible to leave the church simply by expressing intent, and preferably by submitting a written notification.

Unless there is a legally binding contract, rule, or arrangement in advance, you will not be charged a separation fee or alimony, etc., and there is no need to pay even if you are billed.

From here on, you are free to give as much as you say that you have been indebted to until now.

After that, if there is a graveyard as a necessary expense, will it be a relocation of that tombstone or tombstone dismantling and disposal fee, memorial service for removing bones, memorial services for closing eyes, etc.

Also, if a burial certificate is required, it is an expense to have that document issued.

If it seems complicated, you can also leave the procedure to an administrative scrivener or judicial scrivener.

Gassho

First of all, please consult with us carefully

I read it.
Your feelings and intentions are rough, but I understand them.
I have almost no idea what kind of temple and what kind of chief priest the family temple members are, but it is possible to change the family temple by transferring the remains.
First of all, if possible, please discuss carefully and thoroughly with all your family members whether it is really desirable to move the remains or whether they want to change the family temple. Also, please carefully discuss and consider who will protect the graves as the representative client, and make a decision. Then let's summarize your intentions.
On top of that, please talk to the chief priests. I think each chief priest will share their opinions.
So in the unlikely event that something unreasonable or an outrageous request for money is made, let's talk to a judicial scrivener or administrative scrivener and go talk about it together.
Then let's all discuss and make a decision.
The removal, relocation, ossuary etc. of the cemetery will probably also cost money, so let's consult with the stone store, get an estimate, and contact the chief priest about the construction schedule to obtain permission. Also, let's ask for sutras recitation for the memorial service. Please hold the memorial service with the feeling that you and everyone have been very indebted to you until now. That feeling of gratitude is important. The amount of gifts etc. is not important.
Also, please feel free to relocate and do your work, including the feeling that we look forward to your continued support to the temple you have relocated to.
I sincerely pray to your ancestors that you and your family members will continue to cherish your relationships with your ancestors and live well together while being watched over by your ancestors every day. We wholeheartedly agree

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