hasunoha

Doubts about dating the opposite sex

It makes me think about dating someone of the opposite sex.

In modern times, the trend of marriage after a relationship has become common,
Is it right to go out with someone you feel you like when deciding to go out with someone of the opposite sex?

Deciding that you like someone is the opposite of deciding that you don't like someone else,
I feel that discrimination is occurring there, and it feels painful.

Basically, I think everyone has a great personality,
You don't know if it's okay to judge someone from your own point of view in order to go out with them.
On the other hand, there's no one I don't like.

Also, taking care of the person you're dating means
I feel that I have a crush on someone I'm not in a relationship with, and I feel uncomfortable.
It may be a beautiful thing, but everyone has a feeling that they want to take care of others.
I hope everyone is happy.

Recently, I've come to the conclusion that if you're single for the rest of your life, you're equal,
I still doubt that's really the right answer.
However, when I see people I'm dating or getting married, I feel that they seem happy.

There have been confessions from people of the opposite sex in the past,
I thought about things like the one above and turned them all down.

I'd like to hear your thoughts.

5 Zen Responses

The world doesn't have two choices: black and white

Being in a relationship or not is not something you think and decide for yourself, and I think it will only be established when there is a partner.
Both myself and my partner are attracted to each other and go out with each other. That's all.

There won't be any discrimination there. You should treat everyone with compassion.

This is the case because we think about the world with two choices: like and dislike. If there were 10 people, there would be a slight difference in how each of the 10 people felt about them. It's not about likes and dislikes; each person has their own personality and individuality; for example, whether this person has a soft feeling or this person has a core, this is probably not discrimination in the world in general. They are all wonderful people. It's just that little by little, there is a difference in how the receiving side feels.

Also, what leads to marriage is due to having a partner and having a relationship with that partner, and it is probably whether or not they are instinctively attracted to them.
I feel a sense of incongruity in thinking about profit and loss with my head and trying to make choices.

Only the Buddha can have that idea

The Buddha can see all life equally.
Equally, it is a feeling that parents think about their children, and furthermore, it is explained that it is a state where they see “alone.”
This state of affairs is called “Ichikoji.”

But we're not like that.
My child is completely different from someone else's.
Sadly, this is the limit of human wisdom.

That doesn't mean I'm pessimistic.
I am the person who divides me vertically into “people I like” and “people I don't like,” but there is a Buddha who can't abandon me.
Let's listen to the Buddha's mercy and forgive ourselves.
Listening to it with forgiveness is Buddhism.

love

I think it will change when someone you really like shows up (^<^).
Right now, they seem to be looking at things rationally like that, so reason probably trumps the emotion of love. The romance theory on the desk is not the beginning of a real romance.
Apart from that, falling in love with someone is neither discrimination nor eco-friendly favoritism.
Friendship is the most enduring feeling.
However, if the underlying essence is simply “the desire to seek people's hearts,” “the feeling of wanting to be noticed by people,” and “the desire to be treated well by people,” then that probably remains the same as being affectionate to many people.
“People who have petty desires are at ease because they don't seek people's hearts through painful waste.” (Apostasy)
Whether you're a good person or not, the fact itself may be a cute appearance of yourself that you are already attracted to others.
Please feel the warmth of your own life now.
More than a theory of love, a theory of life.
There must be an answer in nama life rather than a theory of life.