To live

Thank you Mikki-san for your question.
I appreciate your feelings.
I have also done things in the past that people have resented.
I regretted it, and I also remorseful. Then, the days of agony continued.

However, I realized that there was no point in continuing those days.
The words in the sutras made me notice.

These are the words of Denkyo Daishi Saicho.

“If you repay your grudge with your grudge, your grudge won't stop. If you repay your grudge with virtue, your grudge will run out.”

“Forgetting yourself and benefiting others is the height of mercy”

Is resentment something that never goes away?
Can resentment only be repeated with resentment?
Do we have to keep up with our grudges all the time?
Aren't you resenting yourself for doing something you hate, and it's a negative chain?

It was a clear phrase in such a vague mind.
If you confront your grudge with a grudge, your grudge won't stop after all.
If you confront your grudge with virtue, your grudge will run out.

It was a moment when I thought it was good to be a monk.
And at the same time, the way to accumulate virtue is the practice of mercy
It is “the act of altruism of forgetting oneself and benefiting others.”

That's why the words of the Denkyo Daishi were connected.
It's difficult to put it into practice, but by doing it little by little every day
Little by little, my resentment will disappear, and I think I will be able to accumulate virtue.

Clinging to a past you can't change
Instead of clinging to someone you can't change
How to think about resentment that can be changed
I think that focusing on everyday actions that can be changed will also change your life.

I believe it is human beings who can create a chain of virtue rather than a chain of resentment.
I'm afraid it's only about the founders of my own denomination
I would be happy if you could feel that Mikki-san is not the only one.

I also have a lot of past that I regret when I think about it.
Contrary to my intentions, it hurt people's hearts and was resented.
No matter what my intentions are, it's a one-way street from the receiving side, so I can't help but make excuses. They're probably still hated.
That feeling hasn't disappeared even within me now, but I don't regret it.

This is because I believe that never repeating the same thing again is my own atoning.
Regarding that mistake, all I did to myself was reflect on my mistakes up to that point and made up my mind not to make similar mistakes again.

Those people may not be able to forgive you.
But since those people were there, I was able to notice my mistake.
I am grateful to those people, even though they are hated.

Even now, I have a relationship with those people from time to time, but even though those people aren't always right in front of me, I can't help but think only about that.
If you only think about that, you won't be able to move forward no matter how long it's been.
Conversely, if you don't move ahead based on that, you won't be able to create yourself without repeating it.

Negative images invite negative elements, and they are being pulled in a negative direction even more than now.
However, even if you try to force yourself to imagine something positive, it's impossible, so don't force yourself to think positively.

I think this is fine by sincerely reflecting on what happened at that time and “since it was like this, let's do this next” and “let's be careful not to let this happen.”

While simply treating what is right in front of me bluntly, I am making use of what I have gained as a result of my reflections at that time.

This is the only thing I can do now.
On the contrary, for me now, those people even seem to be benefactors who made me aware.

Instead of dragging on the past, I believe that if I live hard in the present by myself who has experienced the past, if it is useful to someone, it will be a form of compensation for myself who did this at that time, even if not directly.

My past mistakes were made by my past self, and I won't repeat them now.

I think that's fine.

To Mikki-san

No matter what kind of person you are, you can't live alone,
Big or small, they should be living while causing trouble to those around them.
Isn't that what living means?

In Ei Rokusuke's poem
“What does being alive mean
Making a debt to someone
What does living mean
Paying back that debt
If you borrow it from someone, give it back to someone
Just like someone did that
I'll do that to someone

What does living mean
Holding hands with someone
The warmth of connected hands
Things not to forget
Meguri Mei Ai Ai Ai Ya Gate Day of Farewell
Don't regret it at that time
Let's live today tomorrow

People can't live alone
No one can walk alone

What does it mean to be alive
Making a debt to someone
What does living mean
Paying back that debt
If you borrow it from someone, give it back to someone
Just like someone did that
I'll do that to someone
I'll do that to someone
There's a saying, “I'll do that to someone.”

Gently return the debt you borrowed to someone.
Please forgive Mikki's inconvenience as soon as someone bothers her.

In Buddhism, the mind is thought to be impermanent (changes moment by moment).
“What should I do to make my heart feel better?”
The question is being asked.
Does that mean you feel that your heart is heavy, and furthermore, you feel that it remains heavy all the time and doesn't become light at all?
But that can't be the case.
The only time my heart gets heavy is when I'm thinking about something that makes me feel heavy.
From now on, try to remember the taste of sour lemon or pickled plums.
Go ahead! ... Yes, thank you.
Was your heart heavy even the moment you thought about the taste of sour food?
Your mind can't do many things at the same time, so it shouldn't be heavy when you're doing something else.
However, you connect and edit only the scenes that have become heavy, and assume that they are all heavy scenes.
My response to the question is “I feel lighter when I'm thinking or doing something else.”
As an aside, the mind has such an influence on the body that it makes you salivate just thinking about sour food.
Buddhism also has the aspect of being a sport that deals with the mind, which is interesting.
Please tell your “Kokoro.”
“You won't be fooled anymore! I'll let you change at will!”