Please help

You don't have to think that, so
Please keep on saying it.
Suicidal thoughts
I experienced it too,
Life becomes futile,
Why were you born into this world?
There's nothing good about it.
There was a time when I thought that.
That kind of feeling is natural
It's something that springs up, so
Even if I deny it, it springs up again.
You don't have to think so, so
I will live.
I'm happy.
Try slowly telling it to yourself.
By expressing,
Little by little, the rain seeped into the soil,
Your feelings as if you were going,
It makes it easier.
Try continuing for half a year.
Bored like me,
Even if you're a lazy person, day in and day out,
If you keep reciting sutras,
If you keep going for 50 years,
Somehow, faith and faith
It looks like I was born.
I'm not going to push for faith.
Please believe in yourself,
I love myself.
I will survive.
I'm happy.
I appreciate everything around me.
Please chant it.
I'm praying that six months from now you will have a wonderful feeling and that you will be here.
Namu Amida Buddha

I just want to die every day.
→For now, I think I want to live every day. I am grateful for the lives I have received every day in the morning and evening.

I want to live a happy life.
→How do you live happily? Live a normal life. If every day is fun, you won't understand how much fun it is. It's about living in just the right way.

But it makes me want to die.
→Let's reluctantly think about wanting to live.

I don't have the courage to die.
→It's about having the courage to live.

What should I do?
→This is an issue we share. How to live. Let's live without thinking too much.

Aka-sama

This is Kawaguchi Hidetoshi. This is my humble answer to the question.

How worried you are about the idea of rare death...

There seems to be a feeling of “I want to live happily” but “I want to die”...

What does “fun” in “I want to live happily” actually mean?

Please let me know if you like it again.

I also thought a little bit that maybe it means “I haven't been able to live as happily as I want, so I want to die”...

Kawaguchi Hidetoshi Gassho

When analyzing the psychology of people who committed suicide, there are also experts who say that 90% of those who committed suicide suffered from “depression.”
If that's the case, there is a possibility that even those of you who want to die will be “depressed.”
In other words, since the brain and nerves are not working well, it may be in a state where feelings of wanting to die tend to spring up in the brain.
If you're “depressed,” you won't be able to do your best no matter how “go for it” the monk says.
That's because it's a physical disorder called the brain and nerves.
There is a limit even if you say “good luck running” to someone who has broken a leg.
First, it's important to treat your feet.
Why don't you talk to a specialized medical institution?
I believe that Buddhism has the effect of preventing “depression.” (Health promotion law, brain sports).
However, in order to treat people who are already “depressed,” I think it is better to borrow not only everyday health methods, but also medical help.