I let my pet die because of poverty.

I'm a single mother. My daughter is an only child, so I started keeping male rabbits two and a half years ago, and we have spent time as a family of 3 (feathers) with someone like a younger brother.
Originally, it wasn't easy financially, but recently household finances have become increasingly difficult, and last-minute living was a situation where it was very difficult to secure money to give to pets.

I've also been able to see rabbits not doing well for a few days now.
I want to take them to the animal hospital. But the cost of treating pets is huge. I knew that if I took them, it would cost us parents and children's food and living expenses this month, or even more.
I was only able to stare at the rabbit, which is getting weaker day by day, feeling helpless.
And earlier, it finally came to an end when I was staring and stroking my body.
I'm sure it would have been helpful if they had taken me to the hospital. We may have been able to help rabbits even if we were in debt, but it wasn't possible when we thought about how we humans would live in the future.
I came to my house with no money, and I'm full of sorry feelings for rabbits.
And it's so painful for not being able to let them go to the hospital and remorse not being able to help them.
Rather than the sadness of dying, it is more painful and unbearable that they were unable to receive treatment and let them die even though they may not have died.
Am I a bad person?
Do rabbits hate me?
The feeling of sorry makes it so hard and unbearable.
I knew pets would cost money, but it certainly wasn't good to have one, but my work has changed between when I started keeping them and now, and the money it costs to have children has also increased, and the situation is different.
I shouldn't have kept them. I'm sorry, sorry for the rabbit, it's been so hard.
The ward cleaning bureau collected the pets in group burial, so they were taken in as soon as they died. I was barely able to pay the 2600 yen it cost.
At least they didn't bury them in soil somewhere and were buried as group pets... It wasn't possible to do anything generous...
Am I being punished by rabbits, souls, and Buddha?

3 Zen Responses

The rabbit was happy

I'm sure the rabbit that ended its life after being stared at by you and stroked on the body was happy.
Certainly, having a pet means taking care of your life.
The rabbit might have been saved by taking him to the hospital.
But maybe it didn't help.
On the contrary, you may have suffered.
I don't understand that now.

There are many things that are important when keeping a pet.
Can you keep them responsibly until the end?
Can we sacrifice money or time?
Aren't you bothering those around you?

I think the most important thing is being able to love.
Being able to be with you, even for a short time, was a very happy time for the rabbit.

Let's make a memorial service in gratitude for the lives of pets.

Hello, Itsuka-san.

You've got a nice pet for your child's education. That's great.
They regret not being able to handle pet illnesses due to life difficulties, and that is also a pet rule. If you keep them normally and are no longer sick, that is the life span of a pet.
Taking them to the hospital is now commonplace, but until recently that wasn't the case. There are no hospitals in the animal world. It is also an animal's rule to stop being sick.

Unlike dogs and cats, rabbits are small animals that are very difficult to treat. I don't know if it will heal even if I treat it again. It disappeared naturally this time, so even if you're sad, you won't regret it. If you want to make a memorial service, please join hands with your daughter in the sky for pets that have gone to heaven. Your feelings for your pets have definitely come through. If you have a desire to hold a pet memorial service at a temple, I'll let you do it at my temple. Please let us know your pet's name and the date it died. The memorial service fee is a wish.

I think they're depressed since they lost their pets, but if you can keep a pet for your daughter, please keep one for her.
If breeding is difficult even for rabbits, house mice would be fine. I think it's cheap and easy to keep.

I think it would be harder to live a single life. But for the sake of her daughter, the mother must live well. I think there will be hardships, but just like me, let's not lose to poverty and stay healthy. We are always available for consultation via Hasunoha, email, or phone. Good luck! Gassho

I'm doing as much as I can.

The feeling of being lonely is being blown away by the feeling of being so sorry for the rabbit, isn't it?
When I saw the question, I thought there was nothing wrong with sometime.
Raise them like kids and snuggle up after they get sick...
And it's just the current state.

You can now accept yourself as you are.
Please feel the sense of loss that rabbits no longer exist on the inside of your chest.
Let's let out the emotions that spring up.
The feeling of regret of being sorry interferes with natural feelings.
Again, there's nothing wrong with sometime.

This is what the rabbit said.
“Why are you sad when you've been kind to me?”
“I just lived my life the way it was.”
“Thank you for being kind to me until the end of my life.”
“Well, I'm already going, so don't stop.”
“Thanks and goodbye.”

Do you hate yourself? or...
Thinking that I wanted to help them is just human ego.
The rabbit lived his own way, and then reached the end of his life.
The person who richly supported that life was unmistakably Itsuka-san.
Also, you yourself have had a rich life with the presence of rabbits.

The rabbit is already ahead.
Please don't stop.

The rabbit taught me the importance of a single life.
I hope you will never forget this life and be grateful for it for the rest of your life.

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