I'm starting to hate men...

Both my high school and the university I'm attending now are girls' schools. So I didn't have many opportunities to get involved with men, and I gradually started to dislike men.

I have 2 older brothers, and since they are so far apart, there is almost no conversation, and in the case of my older brother and father, they are in the family category, so I'm not uncomfortable.

However, at my previous part-time job, the senior who taught me was always a man of the same generation. I was taught at close range and occasionally made small talk, but that was uncomfortable (annoying) and frustrating. I don't feel scared. So I don't think it's a phobia.

I don't really understand why men (especially the same generation) feel uncomfortable.
We only dated once when I was in middle school, but we never went out to play because I refused. I never got along that well with the other boys.
Also, in an environment with only girls in the past few years, immunity against men may have disappeared because they have memorized the comfort and fun of only girls.

Being in such a state, I wasn't interested in marriage or relationships. However, I recently had the opportunity to get to know the newlyweds, and they seemed very happy and felt that marriage was a very good thing depending on the person. (Maybe it's because she's a newlywed (^_^;))

There is no society without men in order to live in the future, so maybe it's okay to get married? I also started thinking like that.

So I want to stop feeling uncomfortable with men. I'm having a hard time finding my next job because of this (T_T) I want to fix it somehow, how can I fix it?

Sorry for the difficult sentence m (_ _) m

4 Zen Responses

There is a meaning of gender because there is a difference

It's exhausting to be in a relationship with someone who has a different personality than your own.
But that's probably what social life is in the first place.
What you're not used to is exhausting. Once you get used to it, it may become easier.
Don't worry too much and get trained by the rough seas of society.

The merit of having males and females in living organisms is that they each bring the strengths of being raised in different environments and give birth to stronger offspring.
Therefore, it is an advantage for humans that there are differences between men and women.
However, in the social lives of individuals, differences are stressful, so it's painful, isn't it?
Please suffer brightly.
(This kind of answer itself may make you think that men don't like it or want them to be closer to women's feelings.)
As an aside, men tend to like feeling physical pleasure, such as appetite, sexual desire, and sports. (Of course there are individual differences.)
So, from a woman's point of view, I think there are a lot of guys who are childish or simply stupid.

May you meet someone you can respect

It seems that there are more than a few times when many women hate men.
Teenagers, especially middle and high school students, are probably the time when the ego grows and becomes established. Once you start having your own thoughts, it may be easy to feel disgusted by people you don't understand, especially men. Of course, there are individual differences from person to person, but after that period, many people start looking for men and men for women. They're probably asking each other for things they don't have.

It would be nice if Rin-san also met someone she can respect. You might think so. As you come into contact with many men from now on, please look at that person as it is without any preconceptions. Don't even label them as men, just leave them as they are. I'm sure there are good people. Decisions really make that person invisible. Please put your thoughts aside and take an honest look. Regardless of gender, there will be no disgust.

It would be nice if we could meet someone who both respects and respects each other.

Your senses remain the same, please understand first.

　I don't think a good feeling or discomfort can be stopped by thinking, but “at least what can I do?” I thought about it. Incidentally, I've been married for about 15 years, my daughter is in puberty, and the workplace is an environment where only women work (this is a part-time job).
First, try learning things like “differences between men and women.” There are a lot of books out, so get ready. Or rather, as a foundation for immunity. I recommend Ihoko Kurokawa, but since she is close to women and she loves her son, it might be a bit difficult. Well, there are many similar ones, so I think “brain science” is better than a “women-only” bookshelf. Always “this is how men and women pass each other!” There should be a chapter like that, so please read it to the point where you can memorize it.
Once you get a perspective with that, it's time to put it into practice. Please observe the various boys and men. “Why a man!” If there is a situation where you want to say that, verify whether the theory you learned in the book is correct. First, feel like observing science.
What's so good about that method? Speaking of which, it makes it easier to understand, act. Once you can see the context of “Oh, this is it,” it becomes difficult for you to be swayed by emotions one by one. It makes it easier to see the reason for the other person's statement or attitude, so if you capture that and respond, it will surely be easier to build a good relationship.
Like women, “I can understand without saying anything!” It's not, and to be honest, I think it's troublesome, but human life is not limitless, so I definitely recommend you try it out.
As for marriage... “it's good for some people” is probably correct. “Because I'm a newlywed” is probably a mistake. However, I don't know what status you are in right now, but in any case, it's not easy.
Also, Jane Hsu's “We Propose...” was on TV, and I recommend the original book.

Fornication has no view of the separation between men and women

In Buddhism, there is a commandment called Unholy Fornication.
This not only means that men and women cannot have horizontal relationships,
Don't take a strong view of the separation between men and women,
There must be no discrimination between men and women,
beyond gender,
It means we must not have too strong an awareness of the boundaries between men and women.
By separating men and women through recognition and discernment, an even greater distance can be created in consciousness.
Despite the fact that my life was born from a relationship between both men and women, ideologically dislike things are born.
It should have been fine until now.
Now that I'm old, I feel particularly disgusted and uncomfortable.
It's okay if you hate men for the rest of your life.
That's because it would be nice to be with people who feel the same way.
Everyone is a part of heaven and earth. You're good to be you.

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