What is faith? I'm mad at my father who depends on my dead grandmother
Hello. There was nothing I could do, and after worrying, I would like to discuss it with you.
Today, I went to the first anniversary of my grandmother's death. My grandmother is my father's mother. My father's father (my grandfather) passed away when my father was in elementary school, and since then, my father has lived with my grandmother. My grandmother and mother didn't get along very well. That's because my grandmother was an impossibly self-centered person. (I'm sorry for saying it this way even though he passed away) My father is also a father, and he only protects my grandmother and is always on her side. So my family often quarreled.
My grandmother passed away a year ago, but even so, my father only cares about my grandmother. Today, I went to the first anniversary, and before I went, my father suddenly said, “Because I bought the principal image to be placed on a Buddhist altar.” I started saying that!
My father bought the principal image without permission, and will I have my life put at the end of my first anniversary? I found out about it in the waiting room. I didn't understand the meaning when I heard it. I can't believe they decided such an important thing without permission and bought it without permission.
Every day, I put my hands together by giving them food and water from the Buddhist altar and kamidana. They say they will do their best job hunting for the sake of their family. I thought my family would be happy, and I thought I had faith with all my might.
But my father did selfish things to me, and I was only angry while the monk was giving me sutras. I don't think we can put our lives on until we all discuss and are convinced to place the principal image. We all cherish it, so let's buy it. I think it's just a tree if you're not convinced.
While crying a lot, when I said that life wouldn't go into it even though everyone wasn't convinced, my father said, “I wanted to do it!!!” and only.
I thought faith was something we should do after taking good care of people who are alive today. Nevertheless, my father doesn't always try to solve the family's important future or problems. But I can think about my dead grandmother. I'm angry that if you have the capacity to think like that, think about a living family.
This is my fault, but when I visited graves, I threw a bouquet of flowers on the ground. I'm mad at my father and grandmother. I'm not talking to my father right now.
It's been a long time, but I don't understand what it means to be religious.
Also, since my father is like this, I am full of anxiety about what will happen to my house...