I've fallen in love with married women

if we continue to live this way
Your beloved wife and lovely children.
Also, all of the other family members will be unhappy.
I think you know that very well.
Do you take a moment of pleasure or take all of your future life
Please think about it.

Hello, Ee-chan.

Does Ee-chan want both even though she is “full of her own foolishness and embarrassment”?
While getting “forgetting everything” with her, I also want family happiness.

It's just... it seems difficult to get both. The reason is what each other's families think... What percent is the probability...?

If you take her, Ee-chan and anyone other than her would be shocked. It drags all the way. I can't prepare anything, and even if I'm ready... the damage is severe.
Once I started a family, nothing changed in real life. But... really, aren't families aware? My partner's family too. ... it's probably not that stupid, and can you keep hiding it from now on?
If only they hadn't broken up. A life full of divorce and damages, being caught out someday, being sued for infidelity. It seems to be visible...

It's just... there seem to be many possibilities. If you are “prepared,” you may be able to get through.
But it's good that you confessed.
Among them, the most penetrating method is probably “breaking up.”
They say, “If we leave it like this, it's likely to be a relationship where we only seek the body,” and that's already the case. What are they meeting for? You don't have to act; if it's for your passion and vitality when you were young, the reason seems to be “myself.”
Any reason is fine, such as because the family is having a hard time... but I want them to believe “because the monk said “break up.”

I think it's okay to have happiness that can't be expressed to others...
The people in question are adults, and if they are satisfied, I don't feel like blaming them.

However, he loves his wife and doesn't want to destroy his family. that's a selfish statement, isn't it?
But if that's the case, I'll have to end my current relationship with my girlfriend at some point. When you're being consulted, that's what you think, right?

My partner's girlfriend also has a family, so please have a proper discussion with the two of you.
Whether you continue or break up, take care of your partner (wife, girlfriend) properly.

Women are scary when they betray you ~

Ee-chan
I was asked about a “monk's marriage” the other day, and I wonder if it was superimposed on your current situation.

Now, as for the question this time, whether you ask a monk or the general public, they will say “stop it.” I also said, “Please stop it.”

Have you been married to your wife for about 10 to 20 years? I love that wife, they have 3 children, and they have built a happy family.
The relationship with his wife went from being a lover to becoming a family through a newlywed. The quality of love we have also changed compared to when we started a relationship and when we were newlyweds.
At that time, I met the woman I was dealing with, and the passion I had when I was young was probably revived.

You may not be able to deny that feeling itself.
However, the action cannot be affirmed. Too many people get hurt.
Please have the courage to say goodbye to that person.
I'm rooting for you.

A parable like this appears in the “Magandiya Sutra.”
There is a person who has suffered from a serious skin disease. It also has bugs, and it's itchy and unbearable. To relieve the itch even a little, scratch it with your fingernail and burn the affected area with fire. I feel that the itch has subsided for a while and it has become easier, but the wound worsens and becomes itchy. Bake again. It gets worse again. It's a repetition of that. That person wants to feel even a little easier, and they keep burning with a fire because they think this is the only way to make themselves easier, but there is no cure. It's a parable showing the horror of human illusions.

You have other suffering and major worries that you are not satisfied with, and I think you are confusing them with this relationship. That's what I felt. If so, don't choose the wrong treatment that not only worsens the wound, but also transmits poison to everyone around you. Please search for a path of healing from the root, a path where you can say “I'm happy” with all my heart.

There is more to this sutra. If the skin disease is completely cured by receiving proper treatment, that person no longer thinks “I want to burn my body” at all even when they see a fire.
I pray that your worries and suffering will be exhausted and that everyone in your family will be happy and at ease.

First of all, it's the person I had a discussion with about “monk marriage” the other day.
That question was probably asked in light of your own current situation.

Well, here's the answer,
No matter what anyone says, “It's your own temporary play with fire, so quit right away.” Right.
It's just that I did a bad thing, knew it was a bad thing, and I couldn't forget the thrill I felt at that time...

Namandabutsu

There are also marriages between monks, and there are many divorces between monks.
There are also remarriages of monks.

The title says “I fell in love with it,”
Would it be more appropriate to feel like “I'm no longer enough just liking it”?

Rules are meant to maintain group life, and I feel that they weren't originally created to promote individual self-realization.
I think there is a limit to how individual feelings are bound by law.

Even so, I was taught from Buddhism that I did not rely on likes and dislikes, but on the law, and on the Buddha.
Is it my wife, married woman, family, or myself that I am prepared and confident that I can love for the next 20 to 30 years? I hope you can think about it once.
However, there are times when we break up with either one of them.
What matters is not what you like or what you choose, but whether you are prepared and prepared to break up on your own.

I don't really like the expression a person's wife from a position where personal dignity is valued.
I would be happy if you cherish your preciousness as a person, not because she is a person's wife.

I think hiding and secretly drains energy
The sense of immorality is irresistible, isn't it?
However, the scale is different from hiding an erotic book in one's own room
Naturally, the scale of risk is also different.
If you only want a physical relationship, “go to the customs!” A certain mayor also said, but...
I don't think a physical relationship will last.
because we're both getting old...
There was also an actor who said, “A man can love multiple women at the same time.”
In general terms
If my current home were to break down, I guess I'd be unhappy
The definition of happiness is different for each person
On the contrary, you may feel happy with a sense of openness.
Honestly, right and wrong are based on my own standards
No one knows what's in your heart.
The boy has the darkness of his heart, which is even more muddy.
That's why I'm hiding it with a dowel...
If you have any advice
Maybe “try not to get caught.”
The rest is at your own risk.
One last word “I don't know!” That's it.

To Ee-chan

Why is my heart so painful?
Isn't that, in a sense, the part I know the most?
What choices should I make now
Look at your family and then look at your partner's woman
There will come a time when you have to make that choice.

There is only one thing, if you decide only at your own pace
Since there are a lot of others involved
Just don't forget that it can be painful. Gassho