Anger at my ex-husband

Hello, Saki.

You're getting divorced due to problems with your husband, aren't you? That was painful.
But now it's your problem. We have to live a happy life for our children, so let's spend half our lives looking back on not only my husband's problems but also my own way of life and live a new life for half of our lives.
My husband is bad for social issues, but our problems as a married couple are mutual. You chose a man who would get into that kind of debt and he was a scum bastard. I think one of the causes is probably the resentment you're feeling right now. As long as you have that kind of heart, you'll choose the same bad guy again. If you want to have true happiness, let go of your feelings for him right away. If your heart is broader than his, you'll think “I'm glad we broke up.” I'm frustrated because I have the same narrow heart as him. You won't be unhappy from now on, so you should feel happy. Oh, I'm glad I broke up with him.

Please continue to look back on yourself and create your own mind. I'm still young, so I've had a lot of love affairs and met new men. Please acquire the ability to identify a good man so that you never choose a scum man again.

Good luck! I will always cheer for you. Gassho

Saki-sama

This is Kawaguchi Hidetoshi. This is a humble answer to the question.

If you leave it up to anger and get emotional, it can also be a loss for you.

Here, instead of leaving it up to anger and becoming emotional, I also think it is necessary to suppress and eliminate those feelings of anger and anxiety by calmly and being asked to make amends with what can be done legally.

One of them is, for example, a claim for alimony, child support, etc.

Of course, the other party is in debt and has no money, so you may think that if they go bankrupt themselves, alimony and child support cannot escape as “non-indemnification claims.”

However, after that, of course, actual ability to pay will be an issue...

I also think that effective measures can be taken by consulting with an expert (lawyer) in this area.

Kawaguchi Hidetoshi Gassho

When they were children, they worked as professionals in the neighborhood, and they looked like they were wealthy
I've moved here.
Your husband looks like an elite,
That father is also in the same profession,
They are famous people, so to speak.
Got an arranged marriage,
She was a beautiful wife.
It's great to be a kid! It's like
I had a thought.
they seem kind. I can't hear people's voices.
It was an elegant house.
Speaking of Uchiha,
Bite without hesitation, barks a lot
There is a very stupid Akita dog,
Cheeky little sister.
I'm envious.
However,
A child was born,
My husband doesn't go home much anymore,
The wife is always indifferent
It was done,
One day, the house became vacant.
After that for a while
A man I don't know came to say hello,
It was my wife's older brother.
Since they broke up, they said they came to pick up my sister's luggage.
I didn't say much,
they have to be people.
Isn't your wife mentally ill? My mother was worried.
That older brother was at home for the last time
I was throwing stones at me.
Helpless anger, chagrin,
hate,
It's not easy to disappear.
About that older brother
It's a form of intense anger that doesn't know where to hit it.
I still remember it.
My mother also said that her husband was the worst guy
I still say it now.
I don't want you to be that kind of person.
It hasn't become, is it?
Helpless anger,
It's not that easy to forget.
If it's a rural area, go to the beach or mountains,
If it's a city, go under the overpass of the railway,
Or close the window in the car
Make whatever voice you want
exhale it.
Once you've spit it out and spit it out,
A new life with your child
Please walk.
It's good cause and effect, and bad cause and bad effect.
It is up to Enma to decide how he will be judged.
Your revenge on him is
After 10 or 20 years,
I broke up with you and I'm this
I think I'm happy now!
Show him you're amazing
Please do it.
You have guts,
I have guts,
You won't lose.
You can always win.
Your happiness
Is this his greatest revenge?

I'm praying for your happiness.
Namu Amida Buddha

I read it.
Your anger is certainly justified.
I can only think that it is abnormal that your former husband is fine with debt even in such a situation and is causing trouble to you and your family.
I also think it's unavoidable that I feel your anger is boiling over and over again, and even murderous intent.
I sincerely understand your feelings.

I think you're right, but both you and your child must live from now on.
First of all, the first thing to do is to live a solid life for tomorrow.
So, for example, write down your feelings of anger in a notebook to your heart's content and leave no room for the thoughts that spring up from the bottom of your heart.
Also, I think it's okay to seal it securely and mail it to my temple.
Once we receive that letter, we will make a proper memorial service in front of the Buddha, and we will cook it, in other words, burn it.
The flame of your anger will be sublimated and purified by the Buddha's cooked fire.
How about it?

The flames of anger are directed at me, my children, and my precious family.

Please leave the flame of your anger to the Buddha once and ease it even a little bit.
Also, I sincerely hope that you and your child will feel at ease even a little from the bottom of your heart and that you can live for the future to come.

Our temple is Ichikoji Higashikosho, 1102 Horigome-cho, Sano-shi, Tochigi-ken, 327-0843, Japan.

If you don't mind, please mail it to the parent exhibition.

I sincerely pray to the Buddha that the flames of your anger will be relieved even a little, and that you will live a peaceful and healthy life with your children from now on, and that they will live and grow together brightly little by little.

Also, please take the time to listen carefully to your feelings.

We monks are always waiting for you.