I can't speak well with people.

Nice to meet you, Mr. Boch.

I've always been bad at talking to people either.

The whole time, I was only talking to a few like-minded friends.

I was away from that friend when I didn't want to talk.

But one day, I found someone I liked.

As soon as I did that,

Will that person fall in love with me? What kind of person would see me in the first place?

As if it were a traffic accident, the days of being bothersome (annoying) suddenly came one day.

What kind of person is she from there? What kind of person am I? How do you get people to like you? What does it mean to like someone in the first place? It goes round and round.
When you notice it, what are the various people around you really like? I'm really worried.

Boch may not understand why he has to go out with people right now.
If you do your best, you'll probably be able to live without dating people.
If that's the case, isn't it okay if we don't go out with each other now?
First of all, it's hard to understand what kind of person even my most troublesome self is.

Still, there are lots of interesting people in the world!
This is absolutely true!
If you meet someone like that, please observe them.
Even so, if they become more interested, I think you should try talking to them.

You don't need to force yourself to speak.
But the world is bigger than I thought.
If Boch shows up someone interesting or interesting, try talking to them.

Hey, even the person in front of you who doesn't know why you have to talk to it right now can be interesting when you talk to them properly, there are things in Zara.

Hello, Mr. Boch.
It's a question about “speaking.”

Let's think of Boch's “speaking” as “conversation (meeting and talking to people)”...
We sometimes talk on the line or on the phone, but I'm sure it's a face-to-face “conversation.”

So, if we can come up with one answer,
1. You won't know until you have a conversation.
That's a false answer from an elder, but you're still in high school. It's been a while since we had a conversation. The time may come to know what a “real conversation” is.
For example... someone you like has appeared, someone you want to learn from has appeared, we have a situation where we have to understand each other, etc.
As mentioned above, there must be various meanings of conversation. I don't think you'll know until you actually run into that place.

2. You don't have to talk.
You probably don't have to laugh well. Mr. Boch, what kind of feelings do you have about “speaking”? In other words, are they tied up?
You have to add a punch line, it's meaningless if it's not a fun conversation, and if you don't have a point, don't talk about it.
... No one decided that. Certainly, there is a trend. It would be fun to be able to get on with that momentum, but only there.
Your self-disclosure may also be a necessary condition for conversation, but wouldn't it be nice to have the other person talk to you?
I listen a lot about the other person. I think they're interested, and they might just talk about it without permission. There are things you can gain from it and things you'll notice.

Nice to meet you, Mr. Boch.

I also thought, “Is there any point in speaking?” In my case, it was when I was in college.

“Let's stop talking nonsense. Let's have a meaningful conversation.” I was thinking about that. Then, more and more, I became afraid of having a conversation.

Well, that's all, what I've learned
It means that meaningless conversations and useless words are the most important. In the first place, what is necessary to have a conversation is, in a sense, an administrative procedure. Unnecessary conversations are real communication.

Also, in necessary conversations, interests with the other party are involved, and relationships deteriorate. Unnecessary conversations improve relationships because there is no interest involved.

There is also such a thing,
No matter where in the world we go, I think the first thing we do is talk about the weather.

First, please try to talk about the weather. That alone makes the next conversation come up smoothly.
“Today is hot, isn't it?” or “It's awful,” or “the weather is nice.” I think that by exchanging such words with each other, we first understand the other person's mood, and then communication progresses smoothly.

First, let's talk about the weather!
It works amazingly.

Communication with people is absolutely necessary in order to understand each other.
There are times when it's quite difficult, depending on the other person, when the conversation is bouncy or you don't mesh well.

How about having a conversation with like-minded friends? I wonder if they'll get excited about common topics and naturally make you smile?
I don't think you need to be a good speaker. I want to know the other person's thoughts and feelings, and the conversation can be established just by listening to them just thinking.

I speak sign language. For people who are deaf, this world is close to silence. Sign language is very important information for living. Even if I can't communicate well in sign language, they can read words simultaneously not only from sign language, but also from facial expressions, mouth movements, gestures, etc.

Words uttered casually... I'm always taught to them, who respond with a smile, that they can communicate and understand each other with a variety of ways of expression.

How do you talk about that! What shall we talk about! Try listening to the other person without thinking too deeply. If I think about it, I'll try to convey it in my current words.
I want the conversation to be fun ~ (*^^*)

That kind of thing happened to me in that era too.
I even meet and talk to my friends because everything is bothersome.
Aren't you an adult?
Isn't that why we stopped discussing it with everyone around us?
You won't overdo it.
What do I need right now
Isn't it time to take a fresh look?
Why don't you ask your own mind?
I don't know when the answer will come out,
Over time, you may be able to do something that interests you.

When it comes to “fire” in Japanese and “FIRE” in English, people who are surprised to see or touch a fire say “hey!” or “Huh!” I've heard that the etymology comes from the word that was released.
There's no such thing as “let's be surprised” or “I've forgotten how to be surprised.” Of course, there's no point in being surprised.

Words that usually speak fluently are silent, and words spoken by people who were silent have some meaning. With that in mind, the act of “not speaking (being silent)” is actually very important and meaningful.
There is a comedy boom in the world, and I feel that bright and talkative people are being touted, but once upon a time, there was a time when silence and solitude were virtues for boys.

Other monks have written that it's better to talk, so be sure to check it out. I would like to tell Boch that there is also an option to indulge in thought and express it in sentences.
Please take this as a good opportunity and polish your mind. The words that come out of a clean heart will eventually surpass good or bad, and they will surely sparkle brightly.

What is currently receiving attention in Japan and overseas is the skill of listening and drawing out.
You're not a good speaker, so dare to walk the path of being a good listener and good at drawing out, and try improving your skills in listening to and drawing out what the other person is saying.
Jane, the main character in the foreign drama “MENTALIST,” is also a master of communication, but she doesn't say much in conversation.
Just say the smallest and greatest little words, that's all.
What is more important in the relationship between blur and tuckomi in comedians etc. is the side that puts in tsukkomi rather than the bokeh side that talks a lot. If there is no blur, it won't subside well.
If you don't listen carefully to the blurry person's story, you won't be able to turn it into an interesting story. What is also important for conversation is to keep it in a circle where the person receiving the conversation can handle it well.
In that sense, the Osho world of Hasunoha can also be said to be on the side of tsukkomi.
When I watch comedy and manzai, if I look at it from that point of view, I think, “This person's blur is amazing! (Laughter)” “Was there such a way to switch?” The world will completely change along with new discoveries, and conversation skills will also improve.
There were conversations with His Holiness the Dalai Lama in various parts of Japan the other day, and the most important thing is the ability to listen = the ability to draw out.
In baseball, the focus is only on pitchers and batters, but what is important is a catcher who can take any kind of violent throw.
People are happy to have their stories heard.
It seems that people who are more popular in the night world are people who listen to stories rather than people who only talk about themselves. Listening is part of speaking. Even if you don't talk much, it's part of a conversation or dialogue.
A lot of people just talk about themselves and feel like they've had a conversation.
Then it's not about playing catch; it's just a step by step.
The main part of conversation is learning from each other through dialogue.
Flowers aren't the only ones who talk. Learning isn't just about speaking.
(*'`) ~○\ (-omega-)

Mr. Boch

This is Kawaguchi Hidetoshi. This is my humble answer to the question.

“Is there any point in talking?”... I'm paying attention to this.

I'm still in high school, so this question is really wonderful.

He has what it takes to be a “monk”! (half joke, half serious).

As a Buddhist answer, it is “certainly meaningful at the secular level of the ordinary world, but at the highest level of truth in Buddhism, there is no meaning.”

Of course, the above is very difficult, so don't think too much about it right now.

Anyway, there are times when you notice the truth through casual or unexpected things, so I know this is an important time to think about everything with questions.

Please play the following as appropriate...

The expansion of the world of language and language is called “gi-ron,” and leaving this “gi-ron” and aiming for the state of “gi-ron annihilation,” which was destroyed, is one important thing in seeking enlightenment in Buddhism.

This is quite difficult, but in fact, there are major flaws in language and language.

For example, in response to an “existence,” we use convenient language and words to express and show that thing in order to indicate what it is.

However, is it really possible to show the thing itself...

Language and language are not meant to be shown. If that is the case, your mouth should burn as soon as you say “fire.” But that's not the case.

Language and language are only temporary labels, and they are not the real thing, yet we are lost in the wrong way of thinking that the language or language itself exists at the end of the word, and furthermore, the thing itself exists as an entity, or the wrong way of thinking that it appears as if it exists as an entity, and that it can be shown in language and words because of this, it can be shown in language and words I'm bound to suffer.

Of course, existence does exist, but the way it is is that it is possible to say “there is” for the time being, not as an entity, but as luck, or in expressions using language or language.

... and difficult discussions about “sky and luck” continue... so far due to the character limit for now. Another opportunity to continue... no, don't you need it?

Kawaguchi Hidetoshi Gassho