it's already like this...

I read it.
I'm sure you are deeply saddened by the loss of your son. If you lost someone special to you, that grief is profound, isn't it? What's more, if you're a child, that sadness is probably even deeper.
I sincerely understand your feelings.
Please put your hands on the Buddha and his son and tell them how you feel. Both the Buddha and your son take your feelings very seriously.
My son has already been led by the Buddha, reincarnated under the Buddha, and is now at peace from the bottom of his heart. And they are peacefully watching over you and your husband.
Your son has lived his whole life to the Buddha first and has been watching over you and your husband at least once.
When it's hard, when it's sad, when it's hard to live, please just ask the Buddha or my son. They accept all of your feelings and the way you are.

Living can be very painful and painful. Living in this world is fraught with suffering. Nonetheless, we live our lives protected by the relationships of many people. When it's painful and sad, please put your hands together with the Buddha, your son, and many ancestors and people you have relationships with, and sincerely hold a memorial service and pass on that thought.
The Buddha and your ancestors will always guide you correctly, and support and encourage you.
One day, the Buddha will guide you when you have reached the end of your life, and you will always meet your son.
Until then, please put your hands together with the Buddha and his son, and please guide them, please keep an eye on them with all your heart, and please be nice to Nembutsu.
Namu Amida Buddha Namu Amidabutsu and

Your thoughts will always reach the Buddha and your son.

I sincerely pray to the Buddha, your ancestors, and your son that you will continue to live peacefully and happily with your husband while being gently watched over by the Buddha, your ancestors, and your son.

I read it.
You lost your son, didn't you? I offer my condolences.
It really conveyed my desire to look forward and have a feeling of wanting to be strong.
It can't stay this way.
I have to work like before.
I'm going to be scolded. I'm taken aback.
I can't be spoiled. I have to be firm.
You've lost your son and are looking forward.
I had the impression that he was a very strong person.
But what you need is to dig into the past and pursue the cause
It's not about being forced to face forward and spend every day
It's about facing the anxiety and sorrow you have right now.
You who are suffering are here right now.
Facing who I am now may be the hardest,
Please acknowledge the feelings you have right now.
The more you try to counteract it without acknowledging it, the more your feelings will ferment and bad thoughts will spring up.
Please keep showing the feelings you have right now.
If you don't think the feeling that it shouldn't stay this way,
It may be hindering you.
However, there are absolutely no restrictions on what not to think about, including suicide.
What you think is yours.
I'm not going to pick it up by myself
I recommend that you ask your husband to just listen to what he thinks.
I think your husband probably has something to think about, but what do you think?
it's not adding or subtracting your feelings and thoughts, it's not forward or backward
Try putting it out as it is.

I think this is a continuation of my previous question.
Certainly, the grief of losing a precious son is not something that can be healed.
Maybe that's the case, such as thinking that I was responsible for that, or regretting that there was something more I could have done.

However, at this rate, have you ever thought about “my son,” not Mako-san, who is suffering the most?
We certainly had a relationship, and for a while, we became parents and children. It's not about whether that period is long or short. It is also true that it has made me experience the feelings, responsibility, and joy and sorrow of being a mother up to this point.
How long will I continue to regret it? When are you going to forgive me?
The family, including her husband, is fully aware that Mako is suffering. Since they know it, they're probably doing whatever you want.
Please walk through Mako-san's life while having a memorial service.
Also, having fun with your current family is one of the memorial services.
It's a bit harsh language, but I hope it's helpful.

Hello Mako-san. We had a relationship last time too. I look forward to working with you again.

Even if you can't be positive, if you're still puzzled, or if you don't get stronger, isn't it okay to just stay that way?
It's not something you can get used to thinking about being positive. It is something that has become a matter of time. There's no need to overdo it.

You mentioned last time that your husband and parents were snuggling up to you. I'm sure that hasn't changed even now, but they got scolded.

There may be a misunderstanding or misunderstanding between your feelings. As other monks have said, try honestly talking about your uneasy feelings as a couple. Even if you preface it with “don't get angry and listen.”

Thinking ahead makes you anxious, doesn't it?

I wonder how long this feeling will last. I wonder what lies ahead. What should I do if it stays like this the whole time.

I think anxiety tightens my heart more and more when I think so. But there is no future without anxiety. The future had been uncertain for a long time. Nobody knows what's ahead. What we don't understand is uneasy for humans.

Instead of living by dispelling that anxiety, being able to live even with anxiety may be salvation.
That anxiety was probably due to my relationship with my son. You don't have to lose it.

“You can stay weak, stay uneasy. I'll save you, so leave it up to me as you are.”

It is the Buddha's wish to wrap it up like that. What makes me come into contact with that wish is the anxiety that Mako is currently having. And it's my son's relationship with my husband.

All of them are relationships that make Mako-san meet the Buddha.

Apart from that, the Buddha is not hidden anywhere in this world.

The act of making Mako-san notice Mako-san's true wishes, making Mako-san aware of her current appearance, is praised as a Buddha.

Stay anxious when you're anxious.

You don't have to give an answer right away about how to live. Whether uneasy or at a loss, you can live wrapped in wishes.

Even if it's being attacked by the “feeling of wanting to die.” There's nothing to deny.

It's Kesera Sera, just the way it is. slowly.