Relationship with him like avoidant attachment disorder

Every human being has a fundamental desire to be loved and acknowledged.
Looking for love isn't a bad thing.
Is it also an experience where he wasn't able to get the love he had sought in the past, and the love he was supposed to feel safe about was suddenly lost?
First of all, I think it's important for him to have a good relationship with his parents.
Family is the foundation of love.
If there is no love in the home, it is enough to make a place with love a second family, so it is also a law for two people to cultivate it.
Some men continue to choose to live in their memories of the past.
If you can't avoid deep discussions in the future and take care of the woman in front of you, it would be better to step back as he says.
Either way, we should let him awaken from the “love he seeks” to the love he pours out himself and the love he nurtures.
This is because love is filled with love greater than the love one desires by giving one's own love to others.
As you, you should deliver love to your partner in various forms in a way that you can understand that it is ❝ love ❞ from you, and even if he doesn't feel it resonates as love, you should continue until the other person accepts it as love. It is only when he is accepted that it is love that it really should be called love.
If you express your love in various forms, and you can feel it as love, I think he won't be afraid to accept your love for the first time.
I hope the glacier in his heart will melt.

Narano Kosama
Nice to meet you, my name is Tetsuya Urakami from Nagomi-an.

It is said that the guy I'm in a relationship with may have avoidant attachment disorder.
Since this is an investigation by Naranoko, who is closest and is seriously thinking about the future while having a hard time, I think that possibility is not small.

If you marry him like that, Naranoko might have a hard time.
However, no matter who you marry, it's not without hardships.
If you don't get married, you'll have a hard time not doing it.

My opinion (it may be strange for me as a respondent on such a consultation site) is, “Please choose for yourself which hardships you will take.”

As medicine progresses, strangely enough, the number of sick people increases.
This is because people who were not previously diagnosed with an illness will be determined to be abnormal. I think it applies to both physical and psychological issues.

Naranoko's boyfriend might have been a “slightly eccentric person” a year ago. It is now “suspected that there is an avoidant attachment disorder.”
The folktale “Three Year Netaro” would also be called “Hikikomori” or “NEET” if it were now.

Whichever path you choose, I think there will be joys and hardships.
Please remember Hasunoha again when the hardships you have faced get bigger.

Good morning, naranoko.
Basically, people have anxiety no matter how old they are.
Men are particularly prone to this, and even the chairman of a large company has problems.
Why do men go to places like Ginza until they pay a lot of money?
I go there because it heals this feeling that it's not enough.
Women are the only ones in the world who can heal this man's feelings.
The woman who becomes No. 1 in the store is No. 1 because she can heal this man's feelings.

Is your current boyfriend, naranoko, a man worth healing for?
I think we need to determine if you're a man worth healing for the future of both of them.　　

Naranoko-sama

This is Kawaguchi Hidetoshi. This is a humble answer to the question.

I saw how he liked him and was worried about him in various ways.

“Avoidant Attachment Disorder”... there are things that are difficult about categorizing people's minds as “○○ disorder” and putting them into a mold, but anyway, I know that it is essential to be able to carefully assess each other's future.

Question “Geriatric disorder”
http://blog.livedoor.jp/hasunoha_kawaguchi/archives/1003004192.html

“... Also, in order to have better happiness for each of us without being strangely negative by things such as “○○ disorder,” “○○ addiction,” etc., it is necessary to transform our respective minds for the better. ・・”

To be honest, what bothered me about my humility was “running away into rants and drinking too much.” You may be offended, but in some cases, there are concerns about whether it will develop into domestic violence (DV) in the future.

Instability of temper, lack of compassion, feeling hungry for love... what exactly is the cause, for example, if stability can be achieved by maintaining such a state by firmly grasping whether it is due to any dissatisfaction or stress, and if stability can be achieved by maintaining such a state, that probably supports him, but that is too much of a one-sided burden and stress If it seems like it's going to happen, it's probably going to be a problem in the future...

In the future, when we get married, have a new life, and become pregnant, give birth, and raise children ahead, it will inevitably become necessary to build a mutual support relationship where we support each other and help each other.

From now on, I recommend that they make a firm assessment of whether they are likely to be able to maintain a good balance of mutual support and help each other, or whether balance is likely to be maintained due to the cooperative relationship between each other's families.

I pray for good deeds.

Kawaguchi Hidetoshi Gassho