It's hard to be kind

Thank you, Mr. Shikako, for your question.

I think everyday childcare is going to be very difficult.

But the more I think it's “difficult,” the more I get caught up in my own difficulties.

From my husband's point of view, who has a hard time at work, maybe, “I want to take a weekend or so off.”
Maybe they have that feeling.
There he said, “You only stay at home on weekends, so that time is childcare
When they said something like “cooperate,” it may have become a marital fight
I don't think so.
You may not be able to see how difficult your husband is.

It may be a bit difficult in such a state,
Why don't you try using “Japanese face love language” (wagen aigo)?
It literally means saying kind words with a friendly face.
In Buddhism, it is a form of alms.

Donations aren't just about money.
It means donating what you can.
It's also about being willing to throw away (give up) what you have.

When you give (give up), you must stop and see what you can do
You'll have to think about it.

At that time, from where you are only caught up in your own difficulties,
You can also think a little bit about your husband's difficulties.
I think we can stand in such a position.

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Can I watch over my husband with peace of mind without getting frustrated?
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Excuse me, but as far as I've read the questions up until now, I'm tempted to say “it's impossible.” In the series of questions up until now, have you written about your husband's good points? As far as I've read, it wasn't at all.

I think the reason I even got married was because I thought it would be good for you. From your point of view, I think it was because there was a wonderful place. Even if they have the same opinion, “I want you to make the most of my husband's strengths and strengths in childcare.” I would like to make it a recommendation from that point of view.

If you want to be kind, look kindly not only at your children but also at your husband. Please try to use gentle and kind words without being sharp.

supplemented
There may have been parts of the answer that were lacking in words.
There is no such thing as a perfect person anywhere. They are a married couple who can make up for the parts that don't reach each other, and they want to be a family. Even when we meet with the same face, there are times when they look merciful depending on how the light is applied, and there are times when they look horrible. I think it's also necessary to look at them with such a gentle gaze.

I think it's only when you're a married couple that you can complain and complain to each other. But please be careful not to become a married couple that only ends up complaining and complaining.

　I think you're frustrated with your husband, but why? Are you frustrated? Is it because raising children is tough? Were you frustrated if raising children was easy and easy? Isn't raising children fun?
First, ask yourself a question. It seems to me that I'm just blaming my husband on the pain of raising children. There is a scripture saying “Don't pass by in vain” (meaning: time passes by like light, so don't waste it). No matter what, “my husband must raise children too.” If you think so, isn't it a waste of time? Probably, being able to watch my child grow every day is a privilege for you to have good childcare. Let's focus on our child first and then focus on that. Perhaps the only reason you can concentrate on raising children is that your husband is doing a good job. First, let's rejoice at our child's growth and thank my husband for his work.
Stop wasting time on frustration.