Please tell me how to have a heart for the rest of my life.
Thank you for your support. I'm a 43 year old housewife with no kids.
I was recently told that I am suspected of having mild Asperger's.
People around me other than my husband said, “It's probably a day off even though I don't have children. Why aren't you working?” It is often said.
I think so myself. However, if you do all the housework, it's like you have no time for yourself at all. I've always thought that people act slower than people.
One day, I thought, “If you cook 2 dishes at the same time, you can save time,” and I executed it, but the kitchen became a mess like after the earthquake, and the cooking was also a mess.
I noticed “I can't do two things at the same time” and went to the doctor.
I mean, I'm happy living with my husband, but I had a self that wasn't used to other environments, and I thought it was strange for 8 years.
Incidentally, before I got married, I worked as a caregiver. I was surprised by my teacher, and I wonder why I was able to do it now.
Then I said to my teacher, “I want to work outside...”
The teacher said, “There is a gap between not being able to go to work during infertility treatment. Excuse me, but you're 43 years old. ... I don't recommend working now because I think it's going to hurt myself both mentally and physically. I was told, “Regardless of “working,” I would recommend attending a hobby or club...”
As for infertility, I was once told by an old woman in the neighborhood, “You have defects, so you can't give birth to children.” However, it overcame anger and was stunned, so I was able to get through it by laughing, “That's right, that's a bad wife, isn't it?”
However, being told that I can't work is painful, probably because I really care about it too.
Also, when I thought I couldn't do normal things normally, meeting anyone became a hassle, and I finally became withdrawn.
All I know is that it shouldn't stay this way.
The teacher says, “Take care of yourself,” and my husband says, “Don't overdo it.”
However, if everyone takes good care of themselves and lives without overdoing it, society will go crazy.
I think the economy is spinning because everyone is putting themselves on the back burner and overdoing it.
I can't think about things casually, so I can only think “take care of yourself, don't overdo it = indulgence.”
I'm sorry for the long introduction, but what kind of feelings do you think I should have for the rest of my life from now on? Please tell me.