Life plan with the guy who finished the temple ascetic training

I read the consultation.
I would like to answer in order to somehow bring those unwavering thoughts to fruition.

First, it is said that he will work under his father, but aside from the religion called “Buddhism,” the occupations of “monk” and “temple” are a very important factor.
This is a big factor when it comes to bigger temples and older temples.
This is because, regardless of the actual state of Buddhism, most of the jobs of being a monk are managing ceremonial occasions.

In other words,
“I've been naturalized, but I haven't had a ceremony” or something
“We've been naturalized, but we haven't lived together yet” etc.
This kind of situation is very difficult for him.
“Huh? If the monks themselves ignore the arrangements, they can ignore the arrangements for funerals and memorial services, right?” Once you've been told that, you can't refute it.
If it were gone, unfortunately, modern monks would not be able to live.

Of course, there are people who don't care, so I think it's essential to confirm his true intentions with him.
What I'm saying is
It's like saying, “Now that I'm a police officer, let's stop ignoring traffic lights in my private life.”

However, one more point that bothers me is that this is a very bad imagination,
The point is, “Are you really against your parents?”
In the previous consultation
“I am in a relationship with him on the premise of marriage, and I greeted my parents before entering the mountain.”
I saw it written on it.
If that is the case, and if they place importance on decency, I feel that parents are rather likely to support marriage.
At least, I don't feel like I need to wait a few years.
Wouldn't it be better to go talk to his parents in person?

It's been a while. Has it been three years since you last answered? You've been able to endure it well..

Well, maybe they're a little concerned about their physical condition.

It is said that they will get married as soon as they come back...

Well, more than that, they probably think that after the training is over, the Jinzan ceremony has been completed, and the new environment (state of legal affairs) has come to an end, they can keep a firm eye on life plans, etc., and move on to marriage without worry.

Even though my income hasn't changed that much, my salary will also have to be received in a reasonable amount from now on, so I would like to recommend that the two of you talk clearly once again once again, assuming that area has been decided to some extent, and that you can proceed calmly and in a good manner in various ways after getting married and have prospects for marriage in terms of income.

Well, I think it might be possible to finalize the betrothal and marriage privately first.

First, even if the two of you discuss it like that.

I wish you happiness.

Gassho

Nice to meet you, Toro Salmon.
Thank you for your support.
You've been able to endure it well for 3 years! Maybe for 3 years, a lot of things, all kinds of feelings and emotions piled up in a pool, and I spit out my feelings to him.
I understand how you feel.

> According to him, at first, he said the timing only with his own imagination, but as a result of discussions with his parents, he came to an answer that it was difficult to enroll until a few years after appointment, and that it was not realistic even though the job was not independent.

From Toro Salmon's point of view, “You've been waiting for 3 years?!” There may have been feelings of disappointment, disappointment, or daunting.

However, I feel that Toro Salmon's value is that it doesn't cost money if it's just for naturalization. An environment that is still conservative, like a temple, avoids divorce no matter what, so I think they are extremely cautious.
Other reasons seem to be in every household and temple.
What bothered me more than that. It is conveyed that Toro Salmon is impatient and wants to enroll “quickly.”
From my point of view, it's “turn around if you hurry,” but it makes me sit back and relax.

From an early age, I told my father, “Do it fast!!” I didn't like being yelled at. Even when I'm doing my homework, I'm like, “Too late! Be careful with your characters! Bad posture!!” My body hurts from being nervous because I was told things like that all at once.
What if Toro Salmon is unconscious
If you hear a voice saying “be perfect” → “just the way you are,” “you don't have to be perfect,” “it's OK to fail.”
“Do your best” → “You can rest when you're tired.” “You don't have to overdo it.”
“Please others” → “You can make yourself happy,” “You can make your own judgments,” “You can be disliked.”
“Be strong” → “you can rely on people” “you can expose your weakness”
Give lots of permits as if saying “hurry up” → “slow down,” “you don't have to hurry,” and “you can go at your own pace.” The sense of tension also decreases from the surroundings of Toro Salmon, and the atmosphere changes to a peaceful atmosphere, saying, “Being with Toro Salmon is soothing.” By doing that, you might be able to take more care of your boyfriend's body, right? So, from now on, I hope you don't hurry too fast and take a leisurely look at the surrounding scenery.

P.S. There seems to be a meeting called Odera Madam. There was also a book. SNS too. There might be hints if we interact (^^)

Even from his side, there's a risk that he'll run out of affection from you if he makes you wait a few more years.
Even so, the reason I want him to wait a few years is probably because he still doesn't have confidence as a full-fledged man.
Well, those who are new employees (new hires) and are full of confidence would be scary.
Also, it is necessary to confirm whether it is possible to live on the income from the temple alone.
I think most temples don't have to work part time to eat, but aren't there any financial concerns?
If you do job hunting as a side job while learning about temple work, and even if it's a side job, it may certainly take a few years if you get married after becoming a full person.
Also, he may just be saying “a few years away” out of vague anxiety.
Vague anxiety without specific obstacles is more troublesome.
If you save how many yen in savings, you can see specific goals when it comes to marriage or something.
After all, if you're not officially engaged, love is a world where there is room for a change of heart or rivals.
It seems necessary to meet each other's families, set a betrothal break, and step up to the world (stage) of a fiancé approved by the family.