About people who have failed or made mistakes

Of course, I've experienced a lot of mistakes and failures, and I've been made aware of them each time, and I've learned over and over again, making me who I am now. I'm ashamed of my ignorant self because I think I'm stupid, I'm reminded that I'm helpless, unforgivable, and ignorant.
But even if you tighten your neck or hit him on the head, nothing changes. Even if you can't forgive yourself, the only act that hurts you is to lower yourself.

What do you think about mistakes and failures?

“Normal” is just a standard that parents think. Usually, that's not right. It means that your parents think so. Actually, it's okay to be different from others. because everyone is different.

I've never met a “normal person.” Everyone has various personalities and characteristics, and each person acts differently. The monk's answers to your questions are also varied, aren't there? Even if you read the same question, there are many different answers. It's not a “normal answer,” it's an “answer to that monk.”

So why don't you think about what you can learn without suffering from mistakes and failures? If you don't understand, please tell me about every mistake or failure. Let's think about learning together.

Once again, thank you very much for delivering this important consultation.

I don't feel sorry if I don't strangle you or punch me in the head, that pain. The question is, “Can I live if I make mistakes that normal people don't?” I accept that pain as it is.

I wonder how hurt your heart has been when you grew up being told to “usually do this.” I also walked around with childhood paralysis, so I struggled with the gap between “myself” and “normal.” That's why I didn't think “I want to die” once or twice. However, “myself” at that time was a period where I assumed that I was the most unhappy. As we get older, the way we perceive “ourselves” and “normal” people changed when we began to hear that “normal” people actually live with various suffering and sorrows that are not shown to people.

Well, I have one important suggestion for you. “Remorse” is also a wonderful thing, but there's one more thing. We suggest that you create your own “instruction manual (trisetsu)”. It's about looking back and writing down specific events up until now about what kind of situations you make more mistakes and mistakes, and what kind of ingenuity you can make to reduce failures and mistakes.

Also, be sure to write down the positive aspects of “Trisetsu,” “I'm good at this kind of thing,” “I feel energized when I do this,” and “I'm happy if you come up with this kind of ingenuity.” Knowing yourself more deeply (self-understanding) and sharing it with people around you is very important in all relationships, including work, regardless of developmental characteristics.

What you really want to do shouldn't be “hurting yourself and suffering.” That's why I accepted that they asked hasunoha for a new solution.

I also recommend that you carefully write down each and every “thing I was able to do today” before going to bed every day. You're not alone. All of us at Hasunoha will continue to support you.

Other monks have answered, but the standard for “normal” is different for everyone.
Among us monks, it's probably normal for us to do morning work and clean.
However, depending on the person, there are also different people, such as not being good at mornings, and cleaning starts at noon.
The word “normal” only applies to the majority, and it is by no means correct.

Also, failure is not a bad thing.
That's because it's something you learn from there and connect to the next.
However, I'm guessing that they don't like making the same mistakes over and over again.
I've made the same mistakes over and over again, and even if I try to be careful from now on, it's only for that moment.
No matter how many times I make the same mistake, I think “next time will come.”
You can't forgive yourself for making mistakes, and there's no need to hurt yourself.
There's nothing wrong with people who fail being reckless, and I can forgive them.

I read it.
If you fail, you hurt yourself and hurt yourself, don't you think? I don't know the details about you, but I feel like I can also understand what you think. I understand your feelings from the bottom of my heart.
What is meant by reflecting... on the contrary, is looking back and looking back at remorse, isn't it? I think it's about calming down and calming down again, stopping and taking a close look at your own thoughts, words, actions, and what kind of results you followed, and carefully looked back at them. If you have made a mistake or have made a mistake, I think you should be extra calm and reflect, sincerely repent yourself to the Buddha, gods, and ancestors, sincerely apologize to those you have hurt or caused damage, and try not to commit similar mistakes as much as possible from now on.
Since they are humans, they will inevitably commit mistakes. Improving it is very important, and it will also lead to personal growth.
Please keep in mind and work hard every day from now on, and I will be supporting you from the bottom of my heart.