It's scary to think that there is “nothing” after death
I'm currently a college student, and every day I think about “death” that is far ahead of what is right in front of me.
When I was in elementary and middle school, I was afraid of death due to fear of hell, such as “I wonder if I die I'll go to hell and meet my family and pet dog,” but now I'm starting to think “the world after death is a delusion created by people who are alive anyway, and in reality it won't happen forever after losing consciousness,” and I'm afraid of losing my ego and I can't help but even go to sleep.
I have a family, best friends, and favorite comics and games, and I really don't like the fact that every day is so much fun that it's lost and I can't feel anything, and that there are still interesting things happening in a world I can't observe.
Even if you talk about it or look at opinions on the internet, there are many opinions such as “nothing is fine,” “there are people who just go back to before they were born,” and “there are people who don't want to live a long time uselessly and get into trouble because it's fun now,” so it's not that kind of problem! It makes me feel frustrated.
Every day I think it would be easier if I believed in religion, but my strangely realist self doesn't allow it, and I'm just scared without a solution.
I know it's useless for just an ordinary person who isn't a scientist or philosopher to think about this, but it's scary and scary and I can't help it.
