hasunoha

Can pregnant women go to the funeral?

My mother-in-law has passed away, and a funeral will be held.
There is a family member who is pregnant, and it seems that they will attend the funeral.

I remember hearing from my relatives a long time ago that pregnant women should refrain from attending funerals, and when I looked it up on the internet,
Various information is flying around, such as “it's better not to attend,” “it's okay to go to the funeral if you hide a mirror in your stomach,” and “it's superstition, so it's okay for pregnant women to attend the funeral normally,” etc., and is something true?

When I told my husband, “That's superstition,” he didn't particularly care.
I'm not pregnant. A female relative is pregnant.

My husband's relatives are people who don't care much about superstitions.

The pregnant woman said she would come to the crematorium too.

I tend to worry about superstitions from a long time ago when there is a reason for the taboos that have been said for a long time.

I try my best not to do things that are taboo or unlucky.
I never did anything like sticking chopsticks into the meal or getting married on Butsumetsu Day.

Pregnant women also say they want to attend the funeral, so I think it can't be helped, but I don't want them to come to the crematorium.

When I read it on the internet, it said a lot of disgusting things, such as hurting the fetus.

Is this true?

4 Zen Responses

I think there are many kinds of superstitions, such as complete nonsense, and they are born for some reason.
What you are worried about may have been born from the reason that pregnant women should not be burdened with their physical condition.

Let's ask them to judge by the physical condition of their relatives. Temperatures are low, and colds are rampant. In particular, crematoriums and graves are cold, and many people gather even if the waiting room is heated, so you may catch a cold.

Note, I had a wedding at Butsumetsu, but there were no particular problems. Let's not get too attached to superstitions.
Buddhism is about thinking and acting rationally.

Let's be considerate of each other's physical condition

I read it. As the Holy Shepherd said, I think pregnant women should refrain from attending in consideration of their physical condition.
Funerals take a lot of care, and it's easy to become mentally unstable.
People around you will also be worried about the pregnant woman's physical condition, so it is important to consider withholding in light of considerations for the surroundings.

The important thing is for each person who has passed away to send a proper memorial service with all their heart. So I think it's fine to the extent possible.

If you overdo it and get sick, you won't have any parents or children.
Then my mother-in-law, who passed away, might even become worried.

Even if the location is different, you can do a memorial service with all your heart.

Let's be careful and considerate of each other.

I would like to ask Nembutsu Otonayeshi Buddha with all my heart for my mother-in-law who passed away in the Pure Land of Paradise.

Namu Amida Buddha

It's an unfounded superstition, but... don't talk about it

 It's an unfounded superstition.

The wife of the deceased's eldest son did not attend a certain funeral, so when I was wondering, the bride was pregnant, so she didn't attend. However, since I didn't pursue it in depth, I don't know if it was due to the person's intention or pressure from those around them.
To be honest, from the standpoint of a temple chief priest, I would like to dispel such superstitions. However, the reality is not that simple. Even though I knew that such taboos were derived from superstition, I dared to avoid speaking about it in the presence of many people as a problem. The reason is that saying “it's superstition” or “wrong” loudly may cause “reproduction of superstition.”

It seems that there are various patterns of contraindications for pregnant women, but I dare not go into specifics. I think there are regions where this kind of taboo remains strong, and there are regions where it is fading. The best thing is “don't talk about contraindications.” This is because talking about it becomes a “reproduction of superstition.” If it comes up as a topic of conversation, tell the people present that “that taboo is an unfounded superstition.” Also, let's tell them that “not conveying the existence of superstitions to pregnant women” is compassion for pregnant women.

At other funerals, there were quite a few cases where pregnant women went to the crematorium and attended funerals. I don't think there were any people around that pregnant woman who spread unnecessary superstitions. Not everyone in the world is steeped in this superstition.

I think it's good to worry about pregnant women. For that reason, please understand that “don't convey superstitions” and “don't talk about it” is the best method.

Let's figure out for ourselves why.

 Are you familiar with the WELQ problem that recently became an issue? This became news, so please search for it once. What you saw wasn't superstition or anything. This information is for the internet only. You believe too much in a short way that people said that originally you have to go back to the first document, because it's written like this on the internet, and because weekly magazines are written like this. Things are “blind elephants.” Let's pay attention to that first. “Rather than the truth about people you don't like, lies about people you like.” There is also the word, so be careful how you only believe in what is convenient for you.
Why are pregnant women not allowed to attend funerals? I thought about it for a moment, but the first thing you should be careful about at funerals is for bereaved families and deceased people. However, when there are pregnant women, I feel attracted to them. Nowadays, the date of delivery can be specified, but in the days when calculations were not established, you probably wanted to avoid interrupting the funeral due to sudden childbirth, bad breath, or other changes in mood? In a sense, it may be a concern for pregnant women.
In this day and age, civilization has advanced and the date and time of delivery can also be specified, so I don't think it's a problem to participate to the extent that you don't overdo it, along with your own responsibility. The funeral home is also well ventilated, and I don't think they want to smoke that much incense smoke. What you should do yourself is not rule out, just attend the funeral.
I used to say, “Kids are loud, so let them leave.” The person who said that said said said that said. I just said, “I don't think it's loud, and I don't think it's intrusive.” I said that. There is no R designation for funerals or Buddhist rituals. Individuals are free to participate and worship. If there are noisy people, I will think about ways to prevent them from leaving in the same way regardless of whether they are children or adults. Letting them leave is my lack of proselytism. This is my own point of reflection. There's no superstition there.