I want to be comfortable

My teacher (high priest) told me when I was young, “It's a world where you don't know where and what kind of traps are being set. “But you trust people too much,” she often lamented while scolding me.

When I was young, I didn't understand the meaning of those words, and I thought it wasn't worth living until I couldn't trust people. However, that was a mistake, and my teacher was right.. Note that the “world” or “people” referred to here refers to the world of monks and individual monks. Even monks are like that. There isn't a day that I don't hear about incidents where school teachers have been turned into rope due to obscene incidents or embezzlement, etc., so even if you're a clergyman, that's the case.

If you think about it this way, this world is basically an alley of Shura and Shura. Each individual human being, including you and me, all live an egocentric lifestyle, which means they just live for their own convenience.

However, sometimes there are wonderful encounters in this world, and it is possible to “extremely exceptionally” meet someone you can trust. I think it's good to value such irreplaceable relationships with a very limited number of people. Also, humans are basically lonely beings, and rather than searching for someone they can trust, I look back on the way of life of my teacher who has already passed away, and that's probably about trying to become a person that others can trust and be recognized by others.

Everyone has the pain of meeting someone they hate or don't like.
Also, everyone experiences both being praised and criticized by others.
So don't worry.
That life is normal.
It's okay, of course, thank you.
They say they want to feel better, but at this moment, there shouldn't be enough pain to death from shock.
Please think, “It's not as painful as I thought in my head, I'm suffering, I'm not unhappy, I'm lonely, but I'm not alone.”

What makes people hate living is mostly interpersonal relationships.
I don't think I can find anything I could get involved with better.
You don't have to have a lot of friends.
I have a few friends in my life that I can really talk to slowly.
You just haven't met that friend yet.
A friend who bullies or makes you suffer is a different juice, even if it's meant to be a friend, just because it's labeled a friend.
That's not a friend.
They're just people.
Keep your distance. Let's cut the edge.
I also don't force myself to go out with friends I don't fit in with.
The right friend for you is sure to be waiting for you too.
Don't give up until the day you meet.
Well, apart from that, friends I want you to have.
It's not the heart, it's the world.
The world is our friend.
But the filter called the mind interferes with it.
When the mind causes a certain kind of thought, it becomes negative gas and torments one's own mind.
I try to make the splendor of the world invisible and show only the bad parts of the world due to the gas within me.
Let's feel the world without mixing your own negative gas and negative filters.
At that time, you'll notice how wonderful you are.

The Buddha was a prince of the Shaka family, and he was planning to take over the throne at some point. However, he abandoned his right to succeed to the throne and became a monk. After attaining enlightenment, I return to my hometown. Then I invited all of my cousins and sons to the wonderful world of Buddhist practice and made them become monks. However, when his father learned about this, he was deeply hurt and cried and blamed the Buddha.

“Buddha, when you became a monk, I felt so much sorrow and suffering beyond words. But at that time, I thought my nephew Ananda was still around, so I put up with it. Ananda felt the same sorrow and suffering when she became a priest. But I put up with it because I thought my grandson Rahla was still around. My heart is torn when I hear that even Rahul has become a monk now. Even if you say that you have attained enlightenment and become a great person, the love of parents who care for their children is another thing.”
When the Buddha heard this, he deeply and deeply reflected...

Even Buddha has hurt people, and those closest to him, by doing things he thought would be good. Also, people with different ways of thinking ignored me all over the city, spoke ill of me, and got into fights all the time. If you read sutras, scenes like that will come up over and over again. Sometimes even my apprentices betrayed me and almost killed me.
It's not about whether Kiko is bad or not; people are like that, and no matter how popular they seem, everyone lives while being hurt somewhere.

The Buddha took that fact firmly. And... “Let's live honestly, no matter how much things don't go our way. As long as I keep trying to live honestly, I will be excited about my life. I lived with the belief that “this is a much easier and smarter way of life than running away or doing something people don't like and living a life full of regrets.” I admired his back and followed him.

It's impossible to get along well with everyone and live a happy life. No matter what the school teacher said, even Buddha couldn't do it, so it's impossible. There's no need to worry about that. However, being able to be depressed in this way is admirable because it is the opposite of Kiko's attitude of trying to live honestly.
Please cherish your time with close friends, don't get along with people you don't do well with, and live a strong life away from dangerous people. It's not strong (strong); it's strong (strong).

I feel like it's normal in the world that I want to be good friends with everyone, but I can't do it easily.
There are things that worry me too.
I think about my opponent and work hard, but the results are always the opposite, and it's hard for them to understand that they get hurt or in trouble.
When you think at that time, were you really thinking about things from the other person's point of view? That's it.
At such times, I usually pretend to think about the other person, but fundamentally, I take my own perspective.
This is quite difficult even if you try to fix it.
I thought the other person would be good, and if they scolded me or made them feel uncomfortable, I first sincerely apologize.
“I thought it would be great”
If you don't have it and originally started by caring for the other person, I think something will change if you treat the other person with compassion until the end.
I'm also in the middle of trying.

Nice to meet you, my name is Ryoga Taiki (Yoshikawa Taiki).
Thank you for posting your concerns to hasunoha.

First, others are mirrors of oneself.
It shows my state of mind, words, and actions as they are, and then it comes back to me.
Can't you just stop hurting yourself consciously?
If you direct frustration or hate on people, what comes back is the same thing.
For now, why don't you stop trying to hurt yourself consciously?

People who say “always ignore or speak ill of someone”
Will they show up among those close friends?

Otherwise, no matter who ignores you or speaks ill of you,
Please love the person in front of you who is on good terms with you now and who likes you now.
And keep in mind that you will become the person in front of you, an important person.
If you become desperate and can't even focus on your loved ones or people close to you, that will only increase your sense of loneliness.

Kiko-sama is definitely not doing anything bad.
I think I'm just worried about my surroundings and haven't been able to notice my own happiness.
It's easy to get depressed, saying, “I just want to be happy every day...”

What is important
It's not “whether you're happy now or not,” but “whether you notice happiness or not.”

Instead of piling up only negative things in response to some kind of failure or event,
・I ate a delicious meal
・The weather is good and I feel good
When it becomes a habit to feel happy and thank you again for things that are taken for granted, etc.
Little by little, what you think is your happiness will be created, and it will be less influenced by people.

In the sentence, “I won't do to people what I don't like being done to me,” but when I think so, I begin to think that this or that might be disgusting, and I can't act because I think of people.

When you think about “doing to people what you are happy to do,” there are mistakes, such as being an intermediary, etc., but the number of people around you who become happy increases, and people appreciate you and smile.

If you think about it anyway, this one is more fun, isn't it?

It's just one way of thinking. Please check it out.

I'm sorry for taking so long.
Also, if you have any trouble, please come to Hasunoha anytime.
Thank you very much.

Ryoga Taiki