About the answers within Hasunoha

I read it. As you might think, men and women are equal. If you are a married couple, I think it is important that both respect and support each other and help each other live.
There are probably various ideas in the world, and it is in today's world that there is discrimination that still cannot be said.
Even in such circumstances, we sincerely hope that it will become a world where people respect and acknowledge others.

I sincerely pray that you will live with your family and everyone around you while respecting and caring for each other while feeling rich in heart and happiness.

　Certainly, I think people have different views on marriage due to differences in generations. But you should shape your happiness no matter what everyone says. I can't be directly on site, but I would like to support you at Hasunoha.
Based on the previous question, tell your partner, “I want to do this from now on.” Please try to express your opinion. There are many things I want to say to the other person, but the first thing I need to do is state my intentions. Because your happiness is the happiness you have with your current partner, isn't it? I think marital life is often difficult. We can't even meet, so let's talk about the future when we meet.
However, I personally don't think your partner's behavior is good. Conversely, I don't think it's good for you to want to have an affair.

Yes... If it were written like that, I would feel resistance too. I wonder what era this story is about. (I don't know what kind of question it was about.)

The way we think about marriage, the way we are married, the way we face work, raising children, and raising children are all equal, and mutual respect is more important than anything else. There are no men or women there.

The cheating story I mentioned earlier is also a harsh expression, but since you are frustrated to have been cheated on, I'll do it too! You don't want to say that, do you?
After having a certain understanding of my husband's behavior, then try replacing it with the opposite, can you go in even if I do the same thing? Isn't that what you're doing? No, no, absolutely no! Instead, have you ever thought about why am I the only one being forced to put up with it or denied that feeling?

That's it, isn't it? Apart from that, have you ever felt like a woman (wife) and thought about not being unforgivable, getting divorced, or having an affair? and. Similarly, women also have physiological things. Rather than saying it's no good because of infidelity, I want to respect your opinion that this is the domain of married couples.
That's what I want to say to my husband, isn't it?
I mean, put yourself in the position of a woman (wife) and think about it properly.

🐱 First, please understand that this is not an answer directed at you.
The exchange between those parties is completely different from your current state of mind today.
Please make them understand with deep and good intentions that this is an exchange between different people.
Hasunoha's exchanges are just letters.
When exchanging text messages, a third party who didn't know the flow until then is the feeling of the parties involved. If you read a situation without understanding it, misunderstandings will occur. Since this is an exchange between parties, we recommend that you do not interfere too deeply.
Just as misreading lines and e-mails has become a problem in the world, I have experienced that the parties involved deeply read things that were not malicious, and when they read backwards, they got involved with myself and read them badly.
Therefore, the cause of this suffering ❝ is not directly related to oneself, and I think it is “a heart that makes it as if it were my own ❞. It's a mentality where you can't forgive other people for doing what you're having trouble with right now.
Even when it comes to others, it becomes like my own.
If you think about it calmly, it's not about me, but I see it as a problem as if it were my own.
They said “a child was injured” at elementary school this morning, so I was worried and flew away. Along the way, various thoughts 👻 have arisen, such as where on earth did they get injured, oh sorry, I want to do a replacement, and even though school had just started, I had a daunting experience and probably didn't like it...
However, even in such circumstances, I later realized that it was dealing with my own selfish delusions. My anxiety subsided when I met the person in person, looked at the extent of the injury, and hugged them tightly to make them feel safe. Even though they were a parent and child, it was the person in question who was injured. It seemed cold, but when I calmed down, it seemed like it was about me, but it was about me, not about me.
When I was working in a department called the Human Rights Protection Promotion Office. I have a strong sense of human rights and justice, and I have become very sensitive to people's sense of discrimination. I had the experience of not being able to read the purpose of the story because I was the only one who had the problem, even though 99 out of 100 people didn't make it a problem. Searching for fault with others became central, and reading the purpose of what was meant to be said was secondary. Certainly discrimination is not a good thing. However, please also understand that there are times when the main line ❝ true meaning ❞ of the sentence trying to convey that “this is how it should be” is put in second place.

Among wild animals, there are species that only marry a fixed partner every year,
There are also types where males mate with anyone without hesitation, and males cause multiple females to give birth to children.
In the case of humans, males will probably try to have multiple females give birth to children in a wild state.
However, in human society, people live by setting rules different from wild animals due to “systems” and “rules” such as marriage, for example.
However, even if such social rules are established, wild animal instincts (sexual desire) remain.

I don't know what kind of answers you were interested in in your question this time,
Instead of thinking within the common sense of modern human society, if you think about it from an even larger perspective and in comparison with wild animals,
I think there are cases where the position of women (especially wives and mothers) is protected by the marriage system.
For human women, there are advantages to not being cheated on by men.
It's not just a matter of living naked like animals and being able to get food; humans have economic problems.
However, if there are no rules like marriage, there is a possibility that males will do whatever they want like monkeys.
I record a program called “Darwin Has Arrived,” which is on NHK every Sunday night.
This is a documentary about the lives of wild animals.
In the wild animal world, there are many types where the division of roles between males and females is clear, and there are also males that kill each other in territorial disputes, etc., and also kill children (other male children) accompanied by females in order to mate with females.
The animal world is completely devoid of concepts such as human rights or gender equality.
When compared to such wild animals, I think there are people who are protected by the marriage system.

The above is an example, but in this way, the viewpoint of a monk who answers is sometimes not limited to the scope of modern human society, but also a viewpoint that takes life as a whole into view.
Among the answers, if the viewpoints of the questioner and the answering monk are too different in the first place, there may be people who are uncomfortable looking at the answers.
I learned that the monks who respond to us must be careful about that.

ABC-san

Your idea is excellent.
By all means, I would like many people to think like that.

What you should do for that
I'm blaming people who think differently from my own
It's about finding as many people as possible who share your thoughts.

Don't dwell on those who stick to the past! Even if you say that, horse ear east wind
Rather than that, let's explain the awesomeness of ABC's way of thinking.

It was a young man's small remark.

I was looking for answers that stated “marriage is for women” and “the marriage system is to protect women.” Is the question triggered by a cell phone correct? I'm sorry if that's wrong.

Certainly, if you look at it as a keyword, you can see how discriminatory language is used.
However, I had my wife read the entire question and answer, and when I asked her, she couldn't read “women should get married because they have a strong tendency to want something in return for themselves, and women are protected by marriage,” or “they try to protect themselves as weak and unattainable beings just because they are women.” I also reread it over and over again, but I couldn't read it like that.

As a context, “Men have an instinct to touch a larger number of people of the opposite sex, and women have an instinct to keep their partner. And the act of keeping a partner called marriage suppresses men's instincts that tend to cheat, and reinforces and guarantees the instinct to keep a woman's partner.” It has become.
There are probably objections as to whether there is such a difference in instincts, to the extent that it is true or false, but even so, it is men who are viewed as weak-hearted creatures in this context.

However, my wife's first voice was “Hmm... I'm not sure,” and I felt that it would be difficult to capture my true intentions unless I read it over and over again with caution. Also, the word “protection” was probably a very misleading way of choosing words. We, the monk who answered, tightened our minds once again that we had to be careful. At the same time, I would appreciate it if everyone watching it would read it calmly and carefully.

appending
The person himself came forward, so I will specify his name. I found an answer that supports the fact that Master Sato is not a discriminatory person like the questioner said, and that he is discussing the system called marriage after treating men and women as equals, so I'll post a link.
http://hasunoha.jp/questions/14536
I don't feel like taking sides with either of them, but I'll just write this clearly. Determining your opponent by stereotyping them and not trying to accept them as they are is the first step towards discrimination. Before appealing against discrimination as a matter of principle, it is important to try not to discriminate every second of this moment.

Hello. I sometimes write “The institution of marriage is for women...” Since I wrote this kind of answer, I've been secretly wondering if questions like this one would come up. So I thought it would be a good opportunity, so I'll write it.
First of all, if I take only this phrase, I think it's “possible” to imagine a context like yours. However, since it is roughly used in the context where Daijishi is written, if “I and my partner don't need that kind of coercive force,” there is no need to get involved in a system called marriage, and I think it would be nice if you stay calm and say, “There are people who say that, but I'm different.”
I think the “theory of why” you mentioned is wonderful, but as long as a “system” is created with a purpose, there is always “this kind of thing humans are” as a premise for that.
If marriage is of the free will of two people only, what is the point of delivering it to the government?
I think the system presupposes that darkness, which probably cannot be relied upon only on the good parts of human beings.
I don't like a society where only institutions restrict human behavior. How far can conscience be utilized as a principle that makes up society (although I have no intention of affirming the current administration or current society as it is)? Since Buddhism focuses on “preparing the mind,” it is always rebellious against “politics and institutions” in a sense.

Anyway, it made me think again about “what is a system.” Thank you for your question.