Sorry for being early in the morning. Good morning.
Um, I was wondering what it would be like to say something like this.
Can I say it?
If I die, should I choose Smokeless Buddha?
Are your parents unfaithful?
Good morning, Kaori.
I saw your question.
In the Jodo religion, they are called “club one place (kueissho),” and it is said that after leaving this world, they meet in the same place.
Since the end of the Edo period, a system of religious believers who maintain family lineage has been established, and I feel that negative images of unrelated graves have become stronger, that houses are lost, and that there are no successors to graves.
When I think about the fact that we originally come from the same place and eventually return to the same place, I also feel that even if it is a splendid tombstone or an unrelated tomb, it is nothing but a temporary value in this world.
What parents want is nothing but happiness for their children. I think living hard in the present and being happy can be said to be the most important act of filial piety.
(It may be Gada Hikimizu, but we have started an activity called “Become a Forest” to give back to this world without worrying about successors. We will let you know for your reference. “Become a forest” ⇒ http://morininaru.jimdo.com/)
That changed the story quite a bit.
I wonder if it's because there is some kind of rebellion or resistance against the parents
Or do you want to be independent on your own, or don't you want to be a nuisance to others,
Does that mean they don't like or believe in religious things?
I became a monk, left the world, and didn't take care of my parents
If you choose by saying that, the meaning is also different.
I think the degree of “parental dishonesty” will change as a result.
Also, opinions differ depending on the parent-child relationship, so I can't say anything.
It's hard to determine whether parents are unfaithful based on this question alone.
Kaori
Good morning.
It's not “smokeless,” it's “unrelated” (^_^;)
Why is Kaori saying “it's no good to choose Muenbutsu?” Did you think so?
Also, what kind of thoughts do you come from when you “choose”?
The story changes slightly, but it's not uncommon for our grandparents in our 30s (I'm 39 years old) to have 7 to 8 siblings.
Then, basically, the eldest son will inherit the house and grave, and even if they don't happen to have children, they can adopt a sibling's child (nephew) and inherit them.
I think it was a rare situation where no one took over the family's tomb.
However, the number of siblings has decreased from 4 to 5 siblings in the parent generation, 2 to 3 siblings in our generation, and 1 to 2 siblings in our child generation, and it seems that it will gradually become difficult to connect them later as before.
As mentioned above, it used to be a rare case, so there was a bad image of the unrelated Buddha and the unrelated tomb. However, in the future, they are called marriage tombs, joint graves, etc., and I think the number of people who choose them will increase.
Therefore, I don't think it's bad to become unrelated, and I don't think it's equal to filial filial piety.
How about it?
I'm sorry.
Just like I couldn't choose where I was born,
I also know death is something we can't choose.
As you say, there are times when parents are disobedient. You mean you get ahead of your parents.
They die one after the other. Yes, it's the best.
However, this is not the case, as is normal in the world.
Like you, it's very important to think after death.
However, for example, let's say you ask someone to wait for you after death.
That's why they have the will to “do it unnecessarily,” and that
It's something you can't do without asking someone to do it.
Once you ask that, we will walk away from your judgment after that.
What you asked for is your bones and ashes
Whether you eat it or sow it in the mountains or the sea, it won't be your gift anymore.
The person who was asked by you after death may build a grave.
It seems so contradictory that if someone doesn't ask for it, it can't be helped after death.
Since it was a contradiction from the beginning, it was completely “left to me” after death,
Until then, I think it would be nice if you thoroughly “live until you die.”
Speaking of me, my children and relatives also have funerals in the Shinto ceremony or Christian ceremony,
Right in front of Obo-san, well, there will be some resistance (^ω^;)
I'll leave it up to you. Rather, I would be grateful if someone just buried me.
The number of cases where friends serve as mourners is increasing at our temple as well.
“I was told to throw it away, but I want to at least send it to you as a person.”
There is a mourner who said that.
I think there is about one person like that in my life, so I'll work hard for the rest
I think I'm just doing my job.
Gassho
Hello Kaori.
Don't say lonely things~ ♪. (^o^)
It seems that there are no people in this world who actually have nothing to do with it.
This is because if you don't have some kind of “relationship,” it doesn't exist,
Please don't walk the lonely path of “it's me anyway (-_-;).”
Everything interacts with each other, intertwines, and exists together.
This law (various laws, selflessness) is also Buddha's enlightenment and awareness.
Even though Kaori was born into this world, she received many lives from her ancestors, parents, and what she ate, and she received endless relationships and relationships. Everyone is getting involved with a warm thread and moving forward into the future.
Therefore, the fact that we humans look at small things and think “unrelated, unrelated Buddha” may itself be a way of looking at things we have already apologized for.
I'm also in Saitama, so there's a Saitama connection with the cherry blossoms blooming, Saitamaken, right? (^-^)
They may have felt alienated because they were very distressed by their relationships with their families due to their illness. I was also hospitalized due to illness, but my illness is related to this.
There are relationships you don't want to accept, and relationships you can accept.
However, regardless of whether you want it or not, I think that your relationship with your surroundings, which had felt cold until now, will change to a warm relationship, that the realization that you are already eating small lives in the ocean of outer space called a big relationship.
You may only be able to see the cold feeling that bothered your parents and that you are not qualified to enter the grave.
However, at the same time, that thread of connection is also the thread of connection that you are loved and have been loved by your parents. Pull it up and feel the temperature of the thread on the edge with your cheek again. I'm sure there are warm threads too.
Thinking about your own death is a bit lonely and fearful, but then... it's about thinking about how to survive in the present. Actually, it's very important ◎
I read your words of thanks.
You've been able to think about a lot of things and look at yourself because of your illness. It makes everyone anxious. Everyone has things to worry about when it comes to their surroundings. Even so, it is the parents and family who accept it.
No matter how they are sent, the world will be the same. I'll be able to visit the Pure Land properly. I'm hesitant that I haven't been able to live seriously... It's fine! There is no omission from the salvation of the Buddha.
Is your body okay now? Please don't overdo it and treat it well.
Show your parents a smile (*^^*)
Kaori, I think it's good to think a lot about death. “Muenbutsu” is “a tomb, pagoda, or rank plate set up when an unidentified person dies,” and it is not something that can be promoted on its own.
Later, there are times when they become unrelated for reasons more specific than you, but this is done by bad customs or discrimination, and it is not something that lightly talks about unrelated Buddhism.
If you cause trouble to your family due to illness, you don't decide what happens after you die. Let's cause even more trouble to our parents (laughs). “Nothing is as cute as a child who takes care of it.” There is a proverb, but the more you value your life, the more annoying it is if your parents tell you to say it. He's a tough kid. While children are happy when they take care of their parents, they also have a difficult feeling as parents. “Oh, I wonder if this kid is overdoing it for me...”
I understand what kind of illness Kaori is suffering from. Maybe it's also a difficult state to work. Don't you also feel ashamed?
People these days only think about life, and when they think about death, they tend to think they are people who can't read the air, bad luck, etc., but that's not true. As represented by the “Ending Note,” drawing thoughts in sentences about death is as important as drawing dreams. Once with my family is fine. Obon is near, so please discuss it at that time. If you suddenly talk seriously, they'll pull away, so speak lightly, and when your family starts to look serious, hit your own thoughts.
It seems like they lived seriously even though they went to the grave. It seems like they made a social contribution. I think I've paid my taxes. There is no such thing as voting rights from a year ago or internal application forms for high school recommendation entrance exams. More than that, please show me Kaori's way of life. It's not up to you to decide whether or not to go to the grave; let the family left behind decide. If it were Osho at the family temple, I would say to Kaori's family, “Please put your bones in the same grave as your family. Please offer the broken bones to the Buddhist altar and store them in the ossuary. It's my responsibility for living with Kaori.” I say it.
ah! That's right. Please talk to the chief priest of the family temple about various things about death and graves as time permits. This is around the beginning of Obon in September, and we have relatively free time and plenty of time to spare, so I think it's a good idea to talk about it.
To Kaori
I think about death while I'm alive.
I think they're doing some really amazing things at that age.
And I'm sure there was a relationship that led to that thought.
Why do we think so and why do we want to do it
If the reason is clear, I think in this day and age, choices are free.
However, please make a decision by carefully considering the people who will be left behind around you.
I think the same goes for graves. Gassho