About departure fees

I want to quit the temple I'm currently a parishioner and take care of a different temple.
I've been indebted to them for generations, but when I asked for an eternal memorial service since there were no heirs to the tomb, it was an amount I couldn't pay, so I would like to take care of them at an eternal memorial tomb at another temple.

So, when I told the monk that I would stop being a parishioner, I was charged a separation fee. It was millions.
It would be nice if I were quiet and at my grave, but since it's my parents' temple, I'm going to get married. My niece is also married, so I can't protect the grave. What should I do?

I can't get the separation fee out of my head. Do I have to pay that much?
Also, if it's something I have to pay, how much is the average amount?

Incidentally, when a donation is requested, it is properly paid, and the annual parishioner's fee is also paid.

4 Zen Responses

The inside of my head is money money.

It seems that the separation fee is a key money called “my ancestors have been indebted to you for a long time.” (I'm saying I don't need it, so I'm just imagining it)

If the temple is asking for a thank you
I added one word, “I've dropped all of my savings,” and I thought it would be good to wrap up as much as I could pay appropriately.

But if I had to say it with my senses
Isn't it OK to color graves removal costs?

The separation fee is an idea that does not exist at all in Buddhism.

Since there is no religious or legal payment,
I think there are many temples that don't accept it.

but
If it's a graveyard in the precincts, the bones look like hostages, so
It's not easy to come out bullish, is it?

A few million yen is such a terrible amount,
You might want to talk to the government office or an attorney.

I don't understand the separation fee.

Basically, I think it must be an offering.

I think it's fine to have a slightly strong attitude.

Please request a written basis for this amount.

If you can't talk about it, please ask the head temple for your opinion. Also, tell them that you will talk to the tax office.

Also, there is a way to talk to an attorney.

There is no need for a “separation fee”!

There is absolutely no need to pay unfounded money such as a “separation fee.”
Originally, if you make a request from the temple side, it won't be an offering. Besides, millions of yen is clearly abnormal. Naturally, there are no separation fees or the like in the case of our mountain. I think that's the case with most temples.

Is your tomb in the temple's precincts graveyard? This is the case where there is a tomb in the graveyard within the precincts of the following temples.
When moving remains to another grave, the manager of the graveyard you are moving to will not be able to bury the remains unless you submit a “reburial permit” according to the provisions of the Graveyard Burial Act. In order to have that “reburial permit” issued, it is necessary to sign and seal the tomb manager (chief priest of the temple) where the remains are currently enshrined on the documents stipulated by the government office.
It seems that there are also cases where people are threatened not to impose judgment on those documents if they do not pay the “separation fee.” It is called a “tomb” rather than a “hostage” as it is commonly called. It's money that has no legal basis, so there's no need to pay it.

It's an important tomb for your ancestors. When I think about my ancestors and questioner, I don't think I want to get into a fight as much as possible, so I think it's better to first negotiate with the chief priest of that temple. However, since the chief priest was charged millions of yen, there may be people who have cried and fallen asleep until now. If negotiations seem impossible, I think it's a good idea to ask the person in charge of the stone store, government office, legal experts, etc.

← all dialogues ← previous next →