The direction of my efforts (self-improvement) for ○○-san.

Efforts for oneself and whether the growth obtained as a result will reach the other party is a completely different story.

Your self-actualization efforts are amazing, but I think it's a good idea to use the skills you've gained just for that.

why?
In the field of learning, you can grow infinitely, absorb infinitely, and step up.
Polishing means scraping off unnecessary things from there.
In the step-up phase, I think it's okay to concentrate only on absorption and growth.

What would you think if someone close to you became a completely different person and was amazing, saying, “That's amazing, isn't it?”

Whether you're unfinished, unsatisfied, or frustrated, your feelings will come through if you don't belittle or misrepresent yourself.
Let's absorb it to infinity, and then polish it to remove anything superfluous from there. to each other.

There are many parts I can sympathize with, so I gave a long answer.
I appreciate your enthusiasm.

Yuri-sama

This is Kawaguchi Hidetoshi. This is my humble answer to the question.

One of the Zen questions and answers is a famous question and answer called “Minamidake Bricks.”

By all means, I hope Yuri will take this opportunity to give her thoughts on this question and answer.

“Nanyue brickwork” is an exchange between Nanyue Huaijou Zen Master and Master Matsu Daoyi, who was his disciple in the Tang Dynasty.

“Nichiwei Zazen, because of past questions, why is Zazen, Zazen, where do you draw a Buddha, say to make a Buddha, give a brick a day, polish it in front of an inn, take a mirror, mash a brick into a mirror, say, say, zazen to become a Buddha, an ancestor say, how is it, like driving a car, if you can't drive a car, if you can't take a taxi, hit a cow, that is, Zu is the intention of following words, so you can pass on the mind.”

“Zazen is the only day. When I went to the cause, I asked, “I'm here to do something.” My ancestor said, “Zazen.” “What are you drawing?” It says, “I'm going to do Buddhism.” One day, brush one brick at a time and polish it in front of the hermitage. My ancestor said, “Polish this for something.” Gaku said, “I need a mirror and Sakusan.” My ancestor said, “You can polish bricks and turn them into mirrors.” They say, “You can't get to attain Buddhism by zazen meditation.” My ancestor said, “What will happen, that is.” Gaku said, “It's like driving a human car. If a car doesn't go, is hitting a car right, or hitting a cow is right?” The ancestor understood the meaning under the word, and finally marked his heart and conveyed the law.”

Matsu Daoichi worked on zazen training all day long under Nandake Huaijo Zenji.

Then Nanyue Huaijo Zen Master comes and asks Matsu.

Minamidake “What are they doing here?”
Matsu “I'm doing zazen”
Mt. Minamidake “Why do we do zazen?”
Matsu “To become a Buddha (attain enlightenment)”

Minamidake brings a piece of tile and polishes that tile all day long in front of the hermitage.

Matsu “What do you do by polishing tiles?”
Minamidake “I'm trying to make a mirror”
Matsu “No matter how much you polish a tile, it won't turn into a mirror, right?”
Mt. Minamidake “I do zazen (only) (all day), how can I become a Buddha?”
Matsu “What does that mean?”
Minamidake “When riding a cow cart, if the car doesn't move forward, do you hit the car or hit the cow?”

In this question and answer, Matsu Daoichi realizes the intention of what Nanyue Zenji is trying to say. Eventually, Matsu Daoichi inherited the law of Nanyue Zenshi and became a famous Zen monk who excelled in counterfeiting.

Now, how can Yuri think of this question and answer?

Kawaguchi Hidetoshi Gassho

Yuri
If confession is a mission...
Is the fact that people who have confessed to doing activities wearing waraji now want?

If you are thinking about confessing, what would you like Yuri or the man you want to be in a relationship with to take care of?

I think it would be good to have communication by listening to that part before confessing.
I don't think confessing is the goal.
If you want a better relationship after confessing, I don't think it would be a waste of time and effort to listen to the other person's thoughts.

This could also be a major impetus for clearing the exam.
Romantic energy often exerts its power to maintain motivation
Passing or failing the exam is not someone you confess to, and I think I should take responsibility for it.

Yuri, I think it's important for eagles to try anything when they're young. Studying for graduate school entrance exams, studying for teacher recruitment exams, studying for baseball, TOEIC, etc., is something you can do when you're young, so let's take on more and more challenges. I don't worry about my surroundings. No matter what anyone says.
However, there is a caveat. If you don't do this, you'll feel empty every time you get older.
① Be compassionate. Your life is yours. If that's the case, others think the same. Your pride is nothing compared to others. Please treat others so as not to hurt their pride.
② Always “why?” Don't forget to act. Why go to graduate school? Why become a teacher? Why keep playing baseball? Why take TOEIC? Why do we polish ourselves? Why am I alive? Why are you fluent in English enough to have the chance to go to graduate school, aim to become a faculty member, play baseball, and take TOEIC? It's interesting to live by thinking things like that.
③ Don't stop anything, keep going. There are more painful and painful things in life than fun things. What can endure it is a continuation. It's important to keep up with your goals. Even if you fail or fail, until you complete your goal...
④ I think it would be interesting to try changing the way you look at things. What is important to me is not an educational background or qualification, but getting involved in that path, isn't it? Isn't it something you've been involved in? I think people who think of their educational background and qualifications as a reward will often be able to relax no matter what happens in the future.
　

It's been a while, Yuri.
This is Urakami from Nagomi-an.

I took another look at past questions and answers. There were also topics such as scapegoat and her grandmother, but what is at the center is Yuri's self-improvement and her feelings for her favorite partner.
The fact that questions with parts similar to the content continue to be asked is probably uncertain, Yuri. I work hard for her, but no matter how hard I try, I don't know if it will reach her.

In response to the first question, “I would like to achieve all of my current goals with all my efforts and express my thoughts. companionship. You don't have to be able to do that. You said, “I want to get even a little closer and express my thoughts.”

What I can say is “keep facing the goal,” just like when it comes to “motivation and how to raise motivation.” In fact, you're growing thanks to having a purpose, right? If so, let's continue.

“Peeling off” is something that other people appreciate.
I think people who accumulate efforts they can be proud of even after graduation are more wonderful than people who take pride in their college years for the rest of their lives.

I'm hoping that Yuri will continue to walk towards her goal even though she is hesitant.

Oh, will the sun set today without you having to talk to ○○-san?
“I thought I'd start a marathon, and I was looking for winter jerseys on the internet.
Then there was a good one at auction, and someone else bought it... I'll definitely drop it next time.”
(6 months later)
... wow, wow, it's summer now. ORZ IRAN

For example, we Osho do not preach for others, even when it comes to proselytizing.
It's “just doing what you do yourself.”
I'm just going to unfold that I can be saved there.
Nor is it “for you.”
As a result, people who naturally think “yeah, that's right” simply resonate.
This is the essence of missionary work. The Buddha is also not presumptuous like any religion.
Therefore, the push selling attitude that both love and proselytism are for the other party is out.

Let's compare it to a ramen shop.
Ramen shops serve ramen that they think tastes good to customers.
“You just do yourself.”
However, can you see that being arrogant and having an attitude of making and doing it for you, for you, and for you, is definitely an intrusive, and condescending attitude from above?
I did it for them, and yet, “when things stick, bad things come out,” that's right, Mitsu Aida.
So don't you think it's “for yourself” rather than “for your partner”? ('・ω・`)
What kind of cause should I throw away for her.
It's a thought diagram that asks for something in return for “I made this much effort for ○○,” so if you get dumped, you'll just get hurt to the fullest.

More than that, the essence of life is simply “you do what you do.”
Perhaps she didn't ask for that, and she's still living herself.

I understand that her presence increases motivation.
As a result of making an effort to turn her around behind your back, you will naturally even appreciate her (even if you get dumped) if it leads to your own improvement.

(-_-;)... or rather, it was Tange thinking that if you don't do it early, you'll be taken by another pick-up bastard in reality.)

Yes, if it were you..., I'm sure you'll be fine!
probably. Maybe. When... is that day. Go to title ↑