Can we only be sad until the 49th?

Hello, Mr. Mori.

There's nothing you can only be sad about until the 49th.
That information about the spirit world is misinterpreted.
Precisely because there is grief, memorial services are held while gradually expanding the space between the 1st and 3rd anniversaries even after the 49th. The body is gone, and we can't realistically know what will happen to the soul. It's just that the state of the soul at the end of the year is nothing but a ceremonial assumption.

After that, we will continue to live in our notions. If you don't forget your husband, he will always be in your heart. I think that is the most realistic feeling. Then, a life of living with those who have died begins. They recite sutras or perform memorial services as a way to feel the reality of their passing.

And the more they realize reality, what makes people who have died the happiest? It makes me think that. If your husband loved you, you will realize that living a happy and happy life without you being sad is his greatest joy.

It still takes time to get that feeling. The time for that sadness to subside is different for each person. Please walk with grief for a while, and build a new life, Mr. Yorimori. I pray for you.

Gassho

The 49th is the day when the remorse comes to an end, and 100 days are called the day you quit crying (the day you quit crying).
Different denominations have different ways of thinking. There are also sects that think that you cannot become a Buddha during 49 days and that you will attain Buddhism on the 49th, and there are also places that think that you will pass away in the Pure Land when you die like the Jodo Shinshu sect. However, grief for those who have passed away will not end in 49 or 100 days. Please be sad enough until your grief heals. It will be a memorial service for those who have passed away. Isn't it important to keep thinking about that person? Please cherish that person until that sadness turns into gratitude. Those who died returned to the Pure Land and became Buddhas, and they are still working to help those left behind by acquiring the Buddha's wisdom and the work of mercy. I think that work gave you an opportunity to ask this question. It's a work that doesn't exist right now, to try to help you. Then, let's think about what they did, and what they couldn't have done in a way that is now. I'm sure that sorrow will one day turn into gratitude. Gassho

It's better not to be sad than to be sad.
because sorrow is pain.
Less pain is better.

There was a disciple named Ananda who was close to the Buddha and always took care of him.
At one point, the Buddha told Ananda that his death was near.
Ananda was upset and sad.
In response, the Buddha admonished us not to be sad.
This is because Buddha taught that all acts are impermanent and that it is natural for people to die.
After that, when the Buddha passed away, those who were already aware among the Buddha's disciples were not sad. People who properly understood the Buddha's teachings were fine even after the Buddha passed away.
On the other hand, people who have not yet understood the Buddha's teachings were saddened and tormented by the Buddha's death.
The Buddha encouraged people to grieve and suffer.
Your husband may also be a member of the Buddha or a Bodhisattva in the Pure Land.
In that case, when you see us in the Java world grieving and suffering, you may be amazed, “There is no need to be sad.”

Buddha too
“I'll be sad until the 00th”
Because I'm not saying anything
Please feel at ease crying.

In the opposite position
If you were going to the Pure Land
How would I feel when my husband is sad?
Do you feel thankful for being sad
do you feel like you don't have to be so sad anymore
Doesn't my husband feel the same way?

Because those who died were attained Buddhahood
He is snuggling up to us as a Buddha.
Imagine being like that.