haven't you been able to attain Buddhism...

Nice to meet you, I'm a Jodo Shinshu monk. The teaching of the Jodo Shinshu sect is that all those who die become Buddhas, and that they attain Buddhism through Tsumiri. My husband is also always attaining Buddhism.
Having said that, Kaotan-san is having a hard time breaking up with her beloved husband, and it's hard for her to accept it. I think that's natural. That's because we've been together for so many years and shared hardships.

However, I'm afraid this is a very harsh way of saying it, but our lives are worth it. There is something called Tenju given to that person. I think that accepting this reality and recovering from this sorrow as soon as possible will make the deceased husband watch over him from the Pure Land and feel at ease.

My husband is now watching over Kaotan with a warm feeling in the peaceful world of the Pure Land without suffering.

Kaotan-san's words of gratitude are always delivered to her husband.

There is the term Buddha wish. It's literally the Buddha's wish. The Buddha's wish is for the bereaved families left behind to be happy. That's why my husband wants Kaotan to be happy.
I also pray that you will live a happy life according to the Buddha's wishes. Gassho

　Kaotan-san, this kind of thing often happens. So-called outfielders can say whatever they want. I want you to make me sad when I'm sad. Sadness, unfortunately, fades as time goes by. Right now it's in espresso state. So, I sympathize with the grief of losing your partner. Even if people who haven't seen it say whether they attained Buddhism or not.
Immerse yourself in lots of memories right now. According to one theory, “mourn” is said to be a word transposed from “speak together.” The bereaved families and acquaintances talk and meet people who have passed away together. That may be the original type of funeral. The feeling of making a memorial service naturally develops when they have finished talking.

Nice to meet you, Kaotan-san. I read your question.

It's been 5 months since Kaotan-san's husband passed away. I offer my condolences.

Kaotan-san is confused when she is told that if she only cries every day, her husband will not be able to attain Buddhism, and that it will interfere with her ascetic practices over there.

What is attaining Buddhism? There are various interpretations of this, but I have explained that “the deceased stands on a death journey and walks closer to the Buddha while being guided by the Buddha.”

The deceased had already finished their relationships in this world and set out on their next journey. I left a feeling of gratitude and memories in this world.

So what does Kaotan-san receive from her husband?
Again, my husband left a feeling of gratitude and memories. All that's left is for Kaotan to pick it up.

Gassho

Thank you for your question.

It's been 5 years now, so I don't think I shouldn't cry.
It's still 5 years.
Isn't it okay if I'm crying?
There were times when I burst into tears during the 33rd anniversary of the death of a parishioner who took care of me, and it didn't become a puja.

That's how deep my feelings for my husband were, weren't they?
It's hard to find a replacement for my husband in this world.
Aren't tears good for communicating with your husband?

Whether my husband is alive or dead, the family is family. That's fine.

Sadness does not end, but sorrow takes over.
Since when will that happen, there are individual differences.
Accepting and accepting are different things.
Nothing wrong with it as it is now.

It's fine.
You can leave it as is.

The world of the Buddha isn't a small world where one person's tears will cloud it, so don't worry about ascetic practices.

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Yes. You can cry.
It's a human thing.

You can still cry while you feel like crying.
Eventually, I think there will be no need to cry when my husband's backup is complete from “Portrait” to Kaotan's “Heart Projector.”
The last place my husband ends up in is Kaotan-sama's heart. After training in the Buddhist world, the port I returned to was not a hospital, but Kaotan-sama's place.

Actually, it's not a loss, and from now on, they will continue to be swayed by the presence or absence of a “living together” form and will continue to be united. That's what Gassho is for.

I hope one day they will notice that point of view.

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Thank you so much for your response.
Tears come out in front of portraits not only because they are sad, but also because they behave in a good-natured manner outside the house.
That's because they're doing their best in society.

The front of the portrait is a place where you don't have to work hard.
The place in front of my husband's portrait is a nice place to be.
So it's a place where you can cry.
Crying isn't something to be ashamed of; it's precious.

The same goes for the mido of my temple.
The front of the Buddha is a place where you can cry.

So it's fine.