I read your consultation. I understand how you feel, but there are some difficult questions about how to answer them.
The challenge for answering monks is to search for content that will first be heard and then accepted, even if it doesn't go as far as the Buddha's confrontation theory (speaking according to the other person's ability or condition).
In most cases, counselors do not want to learn Buddhism or practice Buddhism, but rather they want to solve problems that have befallen them.
In terms of Buddhism, of course, as you said, the Buddha is a god in monotheistic religion such as Christianity, in other words, he is not the ruler of fate or the creator of the world, so the Buddha does not inflict suffering on us.
And when it comes to where suffering lies, many people probably think it's outside of themselves. In other words, the idea is that bad events and unreasonable opponents are the cause of suffering, and it is good to get rid of them. However, in terms of Buddhism, the cause of suffering is one's own inner affliction.
Even if you ignore that gap in perception and suddenly throw up Buddhist orthodoxy, they won't be accepted at all.
“What? Am I to blame? Even though it's been such a terrible situation!?”
I can see that it ends up being rejected. Therefore, while following the counselor's perception of the current situation, the ideal answer is to first accept that painful feeling and situation, then calm down, recognize the current situation, determine the essence of the problem, and gradually move towards Buddhist thought and practice.
Therefore, the answers are basically one-of-a-kind content for the consultant. I am grateful here at hasunoha that it is shared in this way.
I said “huh?” There are times when even what I think resonates with other people, and vice versa.
Even if you can't choose the events that happen, I think the essence of the problem of suffering lies in how you feel about those events. That's what it means to deserve it. There are probably various paths and convenience (procedures) to get to its essence.
You should also refer to other people's consultations and answers to them, and if you have any questions of your own, please discuss them here.