It's hard being ignored by my husband

I was also asked to read the previous question, but my husband, nothing has changed, has it? I'm too indifferent to my wife and children. People who haven't fully grown up.
It is said that they would like to continue living together in the future, and I can see a life where you put up with it while complaining all the time. In the first place, I don't even treat my wife as a parasite as a family member. Married couples are equal. Even so, the fact that I only see them as people who take care of them is reflected in my husband's attitude.
Your husband seems to be separated from you. I'm sure you've noticed it too.

There are probably parts you want to expect from your husband, but no matter how kind you are, no matter how kind you are to shut up and listen to what your husband says in your life, will your husband change his attitude towards you? I have a question.

Did they get married because they loved each other? Was there an opportunity for it to become what it is now?
I also feel that the DV is moral. Ignoring is also DV. Please make a careful assessment and make happy choices for the future.

Hello, Oyama.

My husband is addicted to cell phones and the internet and ignores who he is with.
This is Al Al's trouble right now. The number of people who have become addicted to the closed nature of the internet space and are unable to have real communication is increasing. I'm also an internet geek, so I'm careful.
Well, my husband is addicted to that world and has gained pleasure, so he is unaware of the importance of communication between husband and wife. I think it would be difficult even if you try to force it out. It's sad, but that's actually the reality of marriage. The other day, there was an interview on video about a couple who hadn't had a conversation with their husband for 20 years. I feel like couples in the old days were like that a lot. Chatting is fun for women, but Japanese men have an otaku temperament, so they are addicted and have a closed temperament. I think men who are too talkative are annoying too (laughs).
The first thing to do is not depend on your husband for your happiness. Whether you have a conversation with your husband or not, your happiness is created by Oyama. Don't be swayed by your husband's dissatisfaction.
It's a promise that our hobbies won't interfere with each other, so let's enjoy our lives with our own hobbies first. And she shows off her joy to her husband. If your happiness level is in full bloom compared to your husband's internet play, you'll definitely be worried about your husband and you won't be able to help but worry about it. Or you might even get to the point where you doubt that they're having an affair (laughs).
It's about being able to bring that much happiness into your life. If your husband is enjoying online conversations, it would be a good idea to go to a live comedy show in real life. Please laugh to your heart's content with your kids. From there, comedy conversations with comedy friends will also begin. A truly enjoyable conversation is born. After all, internet conversations are only virtual. The virtual cannot beat the real world. If you casually talk about talks you've learned through comedy, your husband says, “Why don't you take me too?” You may be asked to do that. Don't push your husband to have a conversation; let him come on his own. Please, Oyama-san, make such an appeal. Over time, I didn't even think it would be a shame to have happiness through conversations with my husband (laughs). That's because conversation is the greatest joy for women.

If you have kids, I'm on your side. Let's do our best, laugh, and live our lives. Gassho
　
　
　

I read it.
I read that you are worried about your relationship with your husband. I don't know the details about you or your husband, but I really understand your painful feelings.

It's so painful for my husband to keep ignoring you even though he's addicted to streaming apps and enjoying it. It's fine to enjoy your hobbies, but I think that kind of attitude and attitude towards you is a big problem.
It's between the couple, and since they probably had discussions and agreed on hobbies up until now, I don't think I, as a third party, would say anything. However, I still have a feeling that the attitude of ignoring is what it is like as a person.

As you said, you will feel doubts about what you got married for and are living together, and you will also be anxious and worried about how you should live your life from now on.

If possible, why don't you just face your husband again and talk about it calmly.

If you still don't have a sincere attitude, why don't you consult with the consultation desk of a public institution once.
https://www.moj.go.jp/JINKEN/jinken108.html
https://soudanplus.jp/
Let's talk about your thoughts and conditions at the consultation desk for reference only. Then, let's get advice from the counselors. If there is a risk of DV due to an opinion from a third party, I think it's okay to get connected to an appropriate support desk and receive support.

Also, I think it would be good to have a family consultation at the city hall etc.
In any case, don't have to be alone, don't have a hard time, ask a third party to listen carefully and receive various advice and support.

I sincerely pray that you and your husband will sincerely respect each other and have a sense of compassion, and that they will continue to help each other, share various things, and live a rich and happy life from the bottom of your heart. We wholeheartedly agree
And I wholeheartedly support you and everyone.
Please let us know your thoughts again, and we look forward to welcoming you.

Compared to women, it seems that men often lose sight of their surroundings when they focus on one thing.
This seems to be because in primitive times it was better for men not to distract themselves from their prey in order to chase their prey when hunting.
Therefore, there is a possibility that your husband will be ignored or annoyed by the fact that he is doing some kind of work (including TV, reading, etc.) even if you put in a cup of tea.
Regardless of the importance of the work, whether it's just an app or just a game, it's infuriating (even if it's just a phone call or a visitor) when your concentration is interrupted.
That means it might be better to create an opportunity for your husband to focus on you by aiming to talk to him when he's off guard when he's not doing any work, or making a habit of talking during meals.
The fact that “there is no punch line in the story” is also for the same reason, and it may be anger that work is interrupted and time is taken.
I also sometimes say, “Please tell me your conclusion (request matters) first” on phone calls from parents.
This is because if you don't understand the direction (purpose) of the conversation, you will imagine (worry) this and that about the other person's word by word.