I'm a main player, but I'm at a loss about retiring

I'm a third-year college student this spring. For the two years since I entered university, I have prioritized athletic club activities above all else in my life. Expectations were placed on him as a main player, and his seniors really took good care of him. Also, I have had relationships with OB and OG people, and I think they have faced the competition in a blessed environment.

However, as of this year, injuries due to overtraining and family misfortunes overlapped, and I decided to take a break from club activities for about a month. During that time, I began to look back at things I hadn't really thought about until now, such as time with my family, my own life plans, and my studies.

And from now on, I want to spend my time not only on club activities, but also on other things, such as valuing time with my family, getting my own money from a part-time job, going abroad to see the world, and deepening my studies of architecture.

On the other hand, the club activity I belong to is not an organization where the “having fun” way of getting involved is recognized, and I think that if I want this kind of life, I have no choice but to leave.

However, the seniors I respect have continued to compete with high motivation until the fourth grade, and when I think about my bonesetter's teacher who desperately healed my injuries and my comrades supporting my return, I feel sorry that only I changed my mind along the way. Even though my body is in a state where I can recover, I sometimes feel sorry for myself for not being able to fully return to the competition.

Also, there is anxiety that relationships with people up until now will be interrupted by retiring, and fears that “if I continued, I might have seen a different landscape” will remain.

Is it selfish to make decisions to change one's life priorities while having gratitude for seniors you respect and those who have supported you? Or is it OK to accept these changes in feelings as something natural? I'm also worried that I might regret it in the future, so I would appreciate your words on how to sort out my mind and move forward.

5 Zen Responses

What is important is to be honest with the changed “your wishes now”

Thank you for your consultation. Up until now, you've been devoting all your energy to club activities, and you've been working hard in a wonderful environment. Injuries and family misfortunes overlapped, and being able to stop and look back at your own life is definitely not a waste of time.

In Buddhism, there is a term called “impermanent behavior (shogyomujo).” It's a teaching that everything in this world changes constantly, and that no one stays the same. The fact that your mind left the competition and turned to time with your family, studying architecture, and interest in overseas countries is by no means “selfish” or “flight,” but it is a very natural change of mind that occurred in the flow of time and relationships.

Even if you continue tough club activities just because of your in-laws or regrets while “your heart cannot fully return,” not only will you suffer yourself, but it will also be difficult for you to bear fruit in the true sense of the word. Not everyone is a superman who can handle everything, so we always need to sift through “what to choose” in our limited time in our lives. Right now, the most important thing is to be honest with the changed “your wishes now.”

You may feel uneasy if your relationship up until now is interrupted due to retirement, but if it is a true relationship, it will continue even if the way you get involved changes. I think the best way to return the favor to those who have taken care of you is for you to cherish your own priorities in life and walk briskly on a new path.

Please don't blame yourself and take a step confidently into the new world your heart desires. We are supporting your future steps.

worship
Engiji Temple Shakujo

I think it would be good to cherish both of them.
That's because you don't have to graduate from college in 4 years.
I went to college for 5 years, my juniors went to 6 years, and my seniors went to 2 universities (4 years of science and 9 years of medical school).
However, in the case of a senior year, I wonder if it would be helpful for parents to earn tuition fees, living expenses, or at least pocket money by replacing some time in club activities with part-time work.
Please work on what you want to do so that you don't have any regrets.

I read it.
You've been working hard in sports club activities until now during your college life, haven't you? Also, they got injured and their relatives had misfortunes, so they were taking a day off, right? While you're taking a break, your desire to study, work, or travel has developed, and you're worried about whether to continue your club activities from now on. I don't know the details about you, your club activities, or your family, but I can tell you that you are very worried. I understand your feelings from the bottom of my heart.
Specifically, I don't know how you've been active in club activities, but I think you've worked so hard until now. And you probably went beyond your limits and got injured.
First of all, please treat them thoroughly and take care of and heal them both mentally and physically. Your mind and body are finite. And your future will continue for a long time to come.
Up until now, you've been diligently devoting yourself to club activities, so I think the people around you are familiar with it.
Please don't be in a hurry and take your time to face the future yourself.
As you said, your future will expand infinitely from now on. So I think there are a lot of things you want to do and things you want to do in the future. I think there are relationships with people around you, but let's face your own thoughts and aspirations firmly.
I will support you from the bottom of my heart. Close to the Heart m (__) m

it might not be the answer you want

It may not be the answer you want, but from the standpoint of a senior in life, I recommend that you focus on what you can only do now when you were a student.
After all, I think it's club activity and study.
I wouldn't recommend a part-time job unless you're struggling financially.
After all, once you graduate from college, you'll keep working the whole time.
You can experience traveling abroad as much as you want after becoming a member of society.
As for valuing time with family, it seems possible enough even while concentrating on club activities and studying.
If you don't like continuing your club activities lazily, you also have the option of deciding a goal such as winning a tournament, and then quitting once and for all after doing your best.
It seems more important than anything else for you to look back on your school days in the future and be convinced that “I've done everything I could only do at that time.”

Challenges put the most energy into what you want to do now.

I think he has given back the favor to those around him, even though he has worked hard as a main player up to this point. They've probably done their best until now. That time is irreplaceable, isn't it? Until now, this has been the environment up until now.

Then, when the situation I was in changed, I also began to feel that new ideas and time in a different world were wonderful and precious. That's very important.

As you are influenced, your feelings will also change. My current feelings are the ones I have now, and they may change in the future. I think I can pour the most energy into trying to do what I want to do now.

When you become a member of society, your freedom is also limited. Let's take a close look at the world we want to see when we're a student. Spending time with family and loved ones is a blink of an eye. Act when you think.

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