hasunoha

I'm worried because they want to know.

I'm indebted to you.
There are people at work who want to know everything. Not only do they want to know, but they also say it to unrelated people, so they don't like it at work (it seems that complaints have come based on that), the person in my department got sick at the beginning of the year, was hospitalized, underwent surgery, and is currently undergoing medical treatment.
We were asked by that person not to talk too much about me when asked by people who wanted to know, so we only told people who wanted to know the bare minimum. The other day, my colleague and I tried to talk about that person, and a shop came here wanting to know, so I stopped talking
“Why? He said, “Oh, I don't feel comfortable...” and since then they haven't spoken to me or my colleagues at all.
The person who was hospitalized was so severe that it would be an emergency operation, and they are currently undergoing rehabilitation. We're just keeping quiet because it's a sensitive topic and we don't unnecessarily talk about it to people in other departments.
I'm somewhat involved with people I really want to get to know at work, so I'm really worried about not listening (although I'll talk about the minimum work).
Wouldn't it be better to just keep quiet like this? I hope you can give me some advice.

4 Zen Responses

Courage to be disliked

 There used to be a book called.
This person probably has a pretty childish value that “everyone should answer whatever (they) hear.” That's why they quickly say, “Wow, that doesn't feel right.” I'm sure I hardly understand that people dislike my tendencies.
“It's fine if that person doesn't like you.” Why don't you share it with your friends? Because justice is here. The other side is surrounded and unmanned.
Japanese people are kind, but people who don't draw or can't draw this kind of line haven't grown up. Even if they say “I don't feel good,” they only return “Yes, I'm sorry for not being bad.” If we don't have an acceptable sense of distance from each other, it's just going to be difficult.

Let's ask them to handle it as a company

I read it.
I see, there are people who want to get to know others like that and keep talking about them. I feel like I understand that you and everyone are in great trouble. I understand your feelings from the bottom of my heart.
After all, let's talk about that person clearly to the company's HR department or compliance department and call attention to that person as a company. Leaking personal information is an illegal act.
Since that person's awareness of personal information is low, it is necessary to have the company take firm and strict care and make improvements.
If that person still doesn't stop, let's strictly ask for a response as a company.
I sincerely pray that those people and everyone will be able to comply with laws and regulations and work with peace of mind. We wholeheartedly agree

Please keep quiet and stick to your current sincere attitude.

Thank you very much for your consultation. Relationships in the workplace, especially when there are people who are mentioned in the conversation, make me feel tired even at work every day.

First, your response, which was kept silent in order to protect the privacy of those undergoing medical treatment, is a sincere act of caring for the other person. Even in light of the teachings of “body, mouth, and intention (body, mouth, meaning)” in Buddhism, don't worry, it is correct behavior that does not hurt others, and it is not wrong at all.

In Buddhism, we believe that everyone's current personality and behavior are formed by their own environment and experiences (relationships). Those who want to know and keep talking probably have “worries” within themselves, such as desire for approval and loneliness. However, this is just “that person's own challenge,” and there is no need for you to feel responsible and shoulder it.

Even if your partner gets grumpy, there's no need to force them to be in a good mood. Let's keep a psychological distance by looking quietly in our hearts, saying, “This person is in such a state right now.” It is best to maintain an attitude of simply engaging in minimal business communication in a casual yet gentle manner.

There's no need to be impatient if the waves don't stand up. Please keep quiet and stick to your current sincere attitude. I wish you peace of mind.

Worship
Engiji Temple Shakujo

Exploring is an infringement of privacy, so there is also a need for guidance as a workplace.

There are people you want to know, right? But being snooped on is nothing but a nuisance. Things you don't want to do to yourself are things you want to refrain from, right?

Isn't it convenient that you stopped listening at all because you were shunned? It's more convenient to just work and have them keep quiet, so let's just keep it quiet.

Also, in the future, if there is unnecessary scrutiny, I think it is necessary to clearly tell them, “Listening and searching for people is an infringement of privacy, so be careful.” Let's also consider asking for guidance from your boss at work. Also, I want to work in a workplace with safe relationships.