I'm indebted to you.
I have a habit of thinking that makes me think too much about relationships and relationships with friends, and I'm worried.
I wonder if that's what it means, or maybe it's actually like this.
I read too much and tried to read the back words too much, so I wrestled solo, and it became tough being alone.
I would like you to tell me if there are any tips to stop the habit of deep reading by looking only at actual words and only facts.
I read it
It's wonderful to try to treat people with compassion
And predict the other side so that no trouble occurs
I think they are also good at risk management
I feel like it's a great advantage
I paid too much attention to my opponent
Feelings are getting tough, aren't they
It has been announced that 90% of worries don't happen in reality
If you're about to think about a lot
Please try to remember this
Nevertheless
Don't overdo it when it gets tough
Please come here to talk
Gassho
Thank you very much for your consultation. The reason you are deeply troubled by your friendship relationships and exhausted alone is probably because you care about your partner and are trying to deal with them seriously.
To break out of the deep reading loop, let's first accept the fact that “we don't fully understand the true intentions of others, let alone our own.” Every human being is an imperfect being with not only a pure and clean heart, but also an idea of both right and wrong. The reason I explore the other side of the words too much may be because I unknowingly expect too much from the other person, saying “I want it to be like this.”
In Buddhism, there is a teaching called “impermanent behavior.” It is natural that people's minds, circumstances surrounding them, and relationships are constantly changing. Just as nothing stays the same forever, the other person's heart also fluctuates from time to time. Therefore, instead of worrying about the future that is yet to come or suffering by imagining the other side that cannot be seen, please try to receive only the fact that “the other person uttered now” without your own evaluation.
By letting go of guesses and focusing on “living in the present,” your mind should gradually regain calm.
worship
Engiji Temple Shakujo
I read it.
You get so caught up in relationships that you get worried, don't you? I don't know the details of your relationship with you or the people around you, but I can tell you that you are very worried. I understand your feelings from the bottom of my heart.
Well, I also think it's actually very difficult to see the facts as they are. As relationships with people get deeper, you end up reading the other person's mind, so you get strangely intuited, and you start to think the other side of the story even in silly, trivial conversations. I think I have to be careful about that too.
After all, even when having a conversation, it's very important to face the other person calmly and listen to the story slowly. There are times when it's hard to understand the other person's feelings, so I think it's a good idea to calm down and ask questions you don't understand and check. At that time, listen to the other person's words until the end, never run ahead of their words, and don't make your own assumptions without permission.
I know, but the reason why that doesn't happen easily is probably because I'm feeling anxious.
Also, you should be careful about various reports and gossip. I don't know if it's true or a lie just because someone is saying it. What's more, now lies and myths are being spread, and there is a tendency for people to make assumptions without permission. In that respect, it is very important to have firm information literacy and check trends and results calmly without being swept away.
I sincerely pray that you will be able to interact with everyone calmly and peacefully every day, that you will be able to respect each other and deepen your relationships while respecting and trusting each other, and that you can live a healthy life with everyone every day based on the truth. We wholeheartedly agree
Has that always been the case? Have you had any experiences where relationships hurt you or made you feel bad?
As for human psychology, no matter how far you go, you don't know the correct answer. Even I can't read my own deep psychology. So how do you get to know your partner and build a good relationship? It's probably determined while feeling the other person's reaction, expression, and comfort.
Among them, since there are differences, I can notice the merits, and if I feel communication that doesn't mesh, I even try to listen to the other person's story. It's not perfect, so wanting to get to know your partner more will also be an opportunity to deepen your relationship.
If you only look at actual words and only facts, you will be convinced that “I am me.” There's no way to get to know the other person in depth, and if you don't know, just listen. If you don't want to be disliked, don't be afraid.
If you care about someone who cares about you, you care too.