About so-called “bystanders of bullying”

I read it. It's a very serious question, and I think it's an honest question about the “fear” that everyone has at the bottom of their heart.

I'll start with the conclusion.
Your sense of “being on the sidelines from fear of becoming a target” is an extremely normal defensive instinct as a human being. You don't have to blame yourself for being morally wrong.

In Buddhism, there is a term for “self-interest and others (jirita).” Take care of yourself (self-interest) and help others on top of that (altruism). If you break yourself, no one can save you.

So how should we behave? I suggest three “discreet courage.”

1. Resistance Called “Silence”
Leaders of bullying increase the “laughter” and “attunement” of their surroundings by nourishing them. Don't laugh together, just be expressionless. It's the least amount of resistance you can do without being targeted.

2. Become an “afterthought” mental refuge
You don't need to plunge your hand into the fire. However, after the fire calms down, you can secretly call out to the bullied child, “That was terrible just now,” and “I'm on your side.” This “one word” is the last bastion to stop that child's hopelessness.

3. Report using the “System”
If you're afraid to speak your own words, tell the truth using anonymous surveys, trusted adults, or external contacts, or other channels that don't identify you.

“Fighting” is not the only courage. “Surviving and quietly snuggling up” is also a great form of mercy.

The fact that you are having that conflict right now is proof that you have a kind heart. Please cherish “small steps” to the extent possible while protecting that kindness.

I read it.
I read about your thoughts on bullying and how to deal with it. I feel like I can understand very well that you think that. I don't think your idea is wrong. I accept your feelings from the bottom of my heart.

My son was bullied by multiple people just the other day. I started saying that I didn't want to go to school anymore, so when I listened closely, they said terrible things, kicked off, and got caught in the foot. It seems that my son couldn't say anything to those kids.

I wrote what I heard from my son in the contact book and asked my homeroom teacher to respond to it. I told them to say “stop” to children who bully them on the spot when they are also bullied by their son, and to say it firmly so that teachers and children nearby can help them.
I heard from the children who bullied them the next day that they firmly apologized to my son, saying “I'm sorry.”

Bullying is worse. Also, I think it's very important to immediately tell them to “stop” when they are bullied and to talk to people around them so that they can help them. I think it is very necessary for teachers and children around them to protect children who are bullied and ask for help. Also, I think it's very important to be careful not to bully children who are bullied by teachers and people around them.

It's very important to protect yourself, and I think it's also very important to help the children around you to eliminate bullying.
I think it's also very important for children and teachers around you to tell them that bullying is bad.

Isn't it very important to know that if you do such a bad or foolish thing to the child you bully, no one will be able to deal with you sincerely, that you won't have any friends, and that because of bullying, you won't be dealt with by anyone and you will be lonely. Bullying is when you end up isolating yourself or humiliating yourself.

I think it's also very good to keep calm and watch. But how about it? How are you going to form relationships with friends around you from now on?

Hello. My name is Netoyo, and my name is Benji Tarine who is missing one.
Apart from that, it's not Netoyo, but it's just that the boys around me told me that. Actually, a reader here called me.
“Mr. Tange is thought by other boys to be netoyo,” he said. no. I'm just a formality of Bodhicitta.
Bodaishin is the religious spirit of Buddhism that saves all directions up, down, front, back, right, and left. Buddhism is Kannon's hand offering a helping hand. So, if someone is suffering, it's just that you don't need to save them.
When I went to China, Genroshi Tanaka Kiyoshi and Tanaka Makoto, who were with me, were properly aware of the outrageous reality happening in China, and they aspired to save China. Today's China is, so to speak, a terrible bullying nation. They are hated by people all over the world. There are human rights oppression, the invasion of Tibet, the suppression of Uighurs, the Falun Gong massacre, and the Genocide, yet it's the Olympic Peace Festival. Everyone in the world is crazy pretending not to see.
It seems that Ebisu Tanaka wrote a direct complaint to the Chinese government a long time ago. Master Qing Yuan is a state guest in some countries. It's not something you can do. Not even the pope can be the abbot of any sect of Buddhism. That's why I also raised my voice against the anti-Japanese attitude of China, South Korea, and North Korea, which is the cause of division, neighboring countries invaded other countries, and people who commit outrageous acts. “We should stop bullying.” Adult bullying is terrible, isn't it? So they raised their voices and spread that reality on SNS, and disseminated the dangers, the necessity of defense, and how we should be as people.
Then, even though both ordinary people and monks are religious people, most of them don't look at it, and nobody likes it. If you get involved with this guy, you'll be told to keep yourself safe and slack off. Go through with Ina Bauer above the Matrix... OH...
That was the reality.
I also had doubts about how the religious industry could be saved, and concluded that I had no choice but to do what I could. Sending SNS every day. It's been a few years since then. The message below is a reality.
If Mr. Tange was right now, that's fine.
People put self-preservation first. It's just self-preservation first.
So, that's right!
If you elevate that self-preservation to Bodhicitta, you can save yourself and others. It's a power to get rid of bullying. In order to correct bullying, it is important to expose yourself to intervention and public appearances by third parties while maintaining your own safety. As long as people put self-preservation first, let's choose a method where everyone can be saved after properly explaining that. Faith & Bodhicitta

Bullying is violence, isn't it? People who have been assaulted are deeply hurt. it's so deep...
There are people who are still suffering. There are also people who get scared of people and can't leave their homes. There are also people who won't be able to live. And there are people who lose their lives.

Why can't bystanders move? If you become a target... that's probably because there's such a fear of retaliation. This mentality immobilizes movement and encourages violence. The “presence of bystanders” has a big impact on bullying.

This is something I can say because I'm on the sidelines. If someone important to you right now is being assaulted, would you be able to turn a blind eye? If you were being assaulted right now, wouldn't your heart be screaming?

please, someone help me...

(does nothing)

For those who have been assaulted, everyone will appear to be the perpetrator. There is nothing but hopelessness.
How painful and lonely is it?

Please, be a “savior” rather than a bystander. I want you to take action. What can I do for myself now? It's important to think about that.

I am taking DV classes at a junior high school in the city. Among them, what I am telling you is that you will consult with someone without trying to solve it on your own. Talk to an adult you trust, whether it's a parent or teacher. Also, I want you to know that there are various places to consult and support. Courageous actions can save lives.
Also, rather than blaming bystanders, it is also important to create relationships that are easy to discuss and an environment where actions can be made. A society that watches over and supports it is important, isn't it?