Attending a wake funeral

In general, it seems unnecessary to attend.
If you are concerned, I think it doesn't matter if you send a letter of condolence or mail an incense at a later date.

If a parent, spouse, or child of a colleague at work passes away, I think they may attend the wake.
If my grandparents die, I don't think they'll attend.
If your partner is an acquaintance at the level of a colleague at work, I think it's okay to attend.
However, recently there are cases where family funerals or people “decline to offer incense and flowers,” so I don't think it's necessary to attend in that case.
Originally, incense, sympathy, and congratulations have the effect of “mutual aid” to help each other with emergency expenses during life events.
Therefore, even if you have no acquaintance with your deceased parents, if you have acquaintances within the mourner's family, I think it is better to attend in the sense of supporting the “sudden expenses” of that house.
It would be better to leave such a community where they can help each other as a Japanese treasure.
However, as a trend these days, I think “family burials” are increasing because they want to avoid helping each other as much as possible because if they get help from others, they will be bothersome.
Also, even if you don't attend, I think it's good to recite “Namu Amida Buddha” to pray for the souls of the deceased and the healing of the grief of the family.

I think so.

Of course, if you don't know the person who passed away,

“Not attending”

There is no mistake in that judgment either.

I also understand the questions that the consultant is feeling very well.

I myself am more than my relationship with someone who has passed away

I want to cherish the relationships I have left behind with my family.

What I felt when I was reading the consultation

I mean that person visited my wife at her funeral.

At that time, that person probably valued her relationship with her deceased wife.

That's why I would attend.

If your wife is alive,

“You, go and take my place”

That's because I feel like they say that.

Funerals and vigils aren't just for those who have died.

When the family left behind is in grief,

“I'm sorry this time around”

There are times when you can be saved just by having them say one word.

I am the chief priest,

What I'm most thankful for at a funeral

It is the feeling of someone who remembers the deceased.

Nor is it the price of incense.

Nor is it the number of times incense is burned.

They came.

They put their hands together.

That's how I feel.

So, if it were me, I would do my duty.

However, this is just my way of thinking.

If it's really not convenient, there's no need to overdo it.

What is important is not the form, but the feeling of caring for the other person.

Please make a choice you won't regret.

Gassho

Jōkōji Shaku Yasuaki

I think it depends on the relationship. Even if you have no acquaintance with the deceased, if you have lost someone important to the person concerned (your friend or close relationship such as a work relationship), tell them your condolences about how painful it would be, and if you think they would come hand in hand, then you should attend.

Also, attending is not the only way to express condolences. If you're visiting after the funeral has settled down, or if it's not a matter of visiting your house, it's also kind to be concerned by saying “if there's anything I can help you with” when you meet them.

Gassho