What does it mean to forgive yourself

Thank you very much for your consultation. Being aware of the doctor's words and your own fundamental questions is a wonderful “step” in itself.

In Buddhism, there is an important point of view of showing mercy to oneself. “Forgiving” oneself does not mean exempting oneself from sin; it is “stopping blaming one's biological self for not being ideal.”

You are now desperately climbing a hill carrying many heavy loads. Even so, I'm in a state where I'm whipping myself, saying, “I can't climb with a cool face like other people,” and I'm in a state where I'm whipping myself. There is a teaching from the Buddha called “Don't accept the second arrow.” On top of being hurt by the “first arrow” of failure, overwork, or the boss's words, don't stick the “second arrow” of self-denial yourself saying “that's why I'm incompetent.”

The etymology of “to forgive” is “to relax (relax).” Gently loosen the tight strings of your heart.

Starting tonight, try conveying it as if you were in the futon with the feeling that you are in agreement with yourself. “I went to work today too, thought about my parents, and lived really well.” That's because there's no need to measure your precious self with someone else's distorted yardstick.

Worship
Engiji Temple Shakujo

When various situations overlap at the same time, feelings that have been maintained may also be pulled over.
Of course, there are cases where one thing becomes a tailwind in a good direction, but if backward feelings occur, such as “it was possible until now,” “why me,” and “why me,” everything seems like a sad event, and it's likely that you'll lose your confidence.

However, it shakes the feeling that the situation has been preserved. It's not unreasonable. Up until now, I've been working hard to maintain it.

Rather than being hard on yourself if you haven't been able to do it, praise them for their hard work until now.

Then, with the power we have now, let's rebuild what to start with and how to make it reasonable.

My capacity is limited. Once the capacity is full, something gets tough. Let's create gaps in the capacity while loosening and removing them.

And it's not that you can't let go; it's about freeing up room (space) to be your perfect self. I often do it too. If you have space, you'll have more room in your mind. It's the secret to making it easier to maintain.

You, too, have the power to rebuild once again.

I read it.
Something like that happened at the company, didn't it? I don't know the details about you, the company, or your boss, but they said that you're full due to capacity limits, and you offered improvements and that kind of thing. I think it would be very uneasy for me to do it with you. I understand your feelings from the bottom of my heart.
You've also been told here that your doctor also advised you that it's important to forgive yourself. I don't know your condition, but you've worked hard until now, so let's acknowledge yourself. And let's forgive you.
Every human being is finite; of course, there are limits. Please acknowledge and accept that you have worked hard and praise yourself.
Even if your boss tells you that, I think that's enough because you've been trying as hard as possible to do what you can.
There's no need to worry about being told something slightly disgusting; let's ask the company to share it with others and seek business improvements.
Let's acknowledge and forgive ourselves like that.
I sincerely pray that you can continue to acknowledge yourself and live every day with confidence, and that you can live a fulfilling everyday life while respecting and helping each other.
And I will support you from the bottom of my heart.

I'm indebted to you.

Forgive yourself, acknowledge yourself.

This is really difficult (laughs).

I've also been living for over 50 years, and I still don't really understand.

However, when I read the letter, I thought you might be working hard enough.

They challenged the qualification exam, accompanied their parents when they went to the hospital, and continued to go to work while enduring the workload.

Moreover, when it becomes difficult, they can go to the hospital and ask for help.

and yet,

“I have to work harder”

“We should be able to do more”

It looks like they keep blaming themselves.

The doctor's teacher said

“The theme is to forgive and acknowledge oneself”

The word is also

I don't think it means you have to do anything special.

I am

Acknowledging yourself means

“Give your current self a passing grade”

It's not,

“Whether you pass or fail, acknowledge that you are who you are”

I think so.

Even if you fail the qualification exam, it's still you.

You even if you work late.

You even if you go to psychosomatic medicine.

There's no superiority or disadvantage there.

If I had to say it,

So what?

That's it.

If I think it's lacking, I'll try to add something.

If they think it's no good, they try to throw something away.

We work hard to reinvent ourselves.

But if you stop for a moment, you may see scenery you haven't seen until now.

So I don't think we need to search for big answers first.

I'll walk around the park for 30 minutes.

Close your eyes and take a deep breath in the bath for 10 minutes.

I look up at the sky.

I feel the wind.

Try starting with something like that.

Forgiving yourself is not about liking yourself,

“Well done today too”

Maybe it's about quietly admitting it.

Gassho