It makes me want to do whatever I want

Haru doesn't want to hurt or control anyone; she has a desire to “understand someone important to you” and “look in the same direction.”

Actually, there is a saying I came across when I had a fight with my wife and my heart was in turmoil.
Tokoro George's “It's natural for married couples to have different values”
and
“It's natural that your wife and you have different values, and since those two different people spend their lives together, you can live your wife's life too.”

This is not “trouble because it's different,” the idea is “it's interesting because it's different.”
We finally think, “If we love you, we should be able to understand each other.” But is that really the case?

Even when they become a married couple, the environment they grew up in, their values, and their way of feeling are different.
Nevertheless, we will live together. Don't you think that's a married couple?

Also, Tokoro-san
“She would have had a different life if she hadn't married me. However, by marrying me, it became “the life I am.” I am responsible for that.”
I'm also talking about it.

Here, there is a viewpoint of “how you relate to your partner's life” rather than “whether your partner makes you happy.”

When marital relationships become difficult, it becomes easier to look at “why don't they understand.” However, I think love is not about bringing the other person closer to one's ideals; it is about continuing to know that the other person is different from oneself.

Of course, I'm not talking about putting up with bad things. You can tell them that you don't like what you don't like.
However, if “I want you to feel the same way as me” and “I want you to think the same way as me” beyond that, it becomes painful for both of us.

Love comes in many forms.
There is also love where you think it's for your partner and then hunt them down as a result.
Conversely, there is also love that grows by acknowledging differences.

A married couple is not a relationship where either one of them puts up with it, and isn't it a relationship where they can learn the boundaries of “it's okay to get this far, but from here on out, the other person's domain”?

There are places you want to step in, and there are places you don't want to step in. They know the differences and explore a sense of distance while respecting each other.
Even if they are married couples, they are different people and “understanding is a coincidence, and misunderstandings are normal.”

First, walk next to each other while acknowledging that there are parts you don't understand.
I thought that might be a form of long-lasting marital love.

It's convenient for me, and my opponent won't move. If it's something people up until now have told you, take care of yourself rather than respecting them while saying that you want to respect them! Maybe that feeling came forward.

Loving a creature called another person is also adorable, even the “part you don't understand” is adorable, isn't it? After all, he's always like this... but I love that kind of thing too. If you think so, I don't want to force myself to change, and I feel comfortable with each freedom.

　Facing your own heart and the past so far and being aware of it is a truly wonderful step. It's not arrogance. I think they have suffered precisely because they love their partner so much and have a pure desire to face them seriously.
I'm talking about “Tanabata,” which is coming soon. We feel sorry for these two people who have been separated. But my point of view is that there is actually nothing so easy and happy. What if the two of them lived in the same house every day? The way we clean and do laundry, differences in lifestyle habits, and words and actions without delicacy are inevitably noticeable. “Why?” and hunt them down, and your opponent runs away! Exactly like you guys now, your love may have become a “weapon because it's too close.”
However, Orihime and Hikoboshi are different. While you're away, you can live 100% of your “alone time,” and you don't have to worry about the other person's actions one by one. And when we meet once a year, we can sincerely appreciate the other person's very existence and love each other.
What you should do now is not “put up with” bad things.
Like Orihime and Hikoboshi, “My partner has his partner, and I have my own way of life (individuality). It's about admitting that “each person is a completely different creature,” and keep a distance of mind (become independent) just a little bit.
The reason you can't stop pursuing it is because you have a strong desire to “face the same direction and become one” with your partner. However, even if they are married, they are separate people. Trying to force them to go in the same direction would be to deny the other person's individuality.
Not expecting someone doesn't mean abandoning love. It's about being amused and respecting the differences themselves.
You don't have to face the same direction. It's enough just to stand on each other's feet and acknowledge each other's individuality. If you want to hunt down your opponent, play “Milky Way.” Dare to leave for a moment. Enrich your time and “leave alone” your interest in the other person in a good sense. Being together all year round isn't just love. Acknowledge each other's “differences” and maintain a comfortable sense of distance without leaving. That is the greatest wisdom for continuing to love and respect others you don't understand.
Try valuing your own time first, as if you were looking at your partner's “wonderful personality that is different from your own” from a special seat a little far away.

We have received your consultation, Haru.

Since we got married, I felt that Haru's priorities were low, and we've been fighting all year since we got married.

First, it is important to recognize that men are completely different creatures from women.

Most men don't like being restrained or controlled.

Wives who are good at this area simply shut up and let them be free, then stand softly and quietly support their husbands when something happens.

At such times, men develop respect for women.

A sense of distance is also necessary, and I live my own life while imagining the best distance from my husband.

Unlike cohabitation between lovers, marriage is a community of destiny.

Instead of facing the other person and pointing them out to each other, they face the same direction and move forward together.

Your husband is not your property.
They are living together.

And it is precisely because they have different characteristics that they can support each other. We can cover each other's gaps.

If you leave it as it is now, it's like putting your partner in a cage and locking it.
And they're in such a situation where they're feeding them the food they want them to eat.

Well then, the men will run away.

I've made many of the same mistakes in the past.
Even now, I feel like I'll make a mistake if I let my guard down.

It's such a delicate issue.

You said that your husband doesn't have delicacies, but entering your husband's domain all the time is non-delicacies.

If I tried to divide it if I didn't expect anything from the other person, I almost lost respect and even love.

Why is that?
The root is a strong sense of self-love.
It's my own way of thinking.

If you really like your partner, if you want to respect them, think about them as they are.

Apart from myself, that is.

You may find it difficult, but that is training.

When you stop being bound by your partner, simply think about your partner, and when seeing them feel comfortable is your own happiness, a circle of love circulation with your partner is formed, and you can also receive love from your partner.

You will be able to play comfortable catch.

The dam for Haru's heart has now been built.

We have to destroy the dam first.

If you do that, love will circulate.

It may be a long way, but I think Haru can do it.
I wholeheartedly support you.