The commandments and debts, please help

(1) Precepts are given when an individual becomes a disciple of the Buddha (or is deemed to have been a disciple of the Buddha). It's just an individual thing, so it's no wonder that there are people who are not followers of the Buddha = don't have a kaimyo in the flow of ancestors to descendants from generation to generation. Also, this will not affect your descendants and not being able to become a Buddha disciple = you will not be given the commandments.

(2) Kaimyo is a name for living as a disciple of the Buddha. For example, it's similar to the stage name of an entertainer.
It's slightly different from the tea ceremony and flower arrangement “natori.” “Natori” is something you can receive when you practice on that path and are recognized for a certain level of ability, but since the kaimyo are given when you get started, having a kaimyo does not guarantee your ability or knowledge as a Buddhist disciple. In that sense, it's similar to the fact that a stage name does not indicate the presence or absence of power as an entertainer.
Just because you have a stage name doesn't mean you can get a job in the performing arts just because of that. Just because you have been given a commandment name in the same way, that alone does not mean that you can obtain the Buddha's salvation.

Misunderstandings are widespread because the mysterious subject called “kaima fee” has become common, but in the first place, kaima is not something you buy with money. This is not compensation for any service.
In the modern age where relationships with temples have faded, it is not uncommon for people to meet the family temple only during memorial services and funerals. Basically, temples are operated with offerings received from believers. If the number of cases where we only meet once a year, about two or three times in a few years to ten years, and the number of cases where offerings are only at that time increases, there is also an aspect where it is unavoidable from the standpoint of managing a temple to some extent that they want to ask for a certain amount of money on those few occasions.
In modern times, most money is exchanged through the commercial act of service and compensation, so no one can grasp the fact that a consolidated amount of money must be given in an unfamiliar way called donation. I think it is a mysterious subject called “Kana fee” that was conceived in order to explain it in an easy-to-understand manner.
However, it is rather difficult to understand by naming things that are not originally in compensation for services as if that is the case.
The original purpose of offering is for believers to be satisfied to the extent possible.
If there are any difficult circumstances in terms of money, I recommend that you speak frankly with the family temple and consult with them.

In the Jodo Shinshu sect, it is called a “Dharma name,” and it is given as a name (awareness and proof) for becoming a disciple of the Buddha. It's not something you buy with money. At my temple, when attending a funeral, it is natural to be given a dharma name, and there is no need to pay for the dharma name.

Also, it is not such a teaching that the next generation will not be born. Maybe in my relationship with the temple, I was told about the arrangement (due to the individual circumstances of the temple) that people will not be able to receive memorial services or funerals.

However, each person has their own economic circumstances in their lives, so if there are conditions for that, it means that even if they are alive, they are anxious, and future generations will not be saved. Originally, all of the Buddha's salvation is something that reaches sentient beings.

Is it something I can't talk to the temple (from generation to generation) I'm in a relationship with now?
Why don't you talk to a temple that will listen carefully to any circumstances and think about it together? Let's make a relationship with such a temple.
At my temple, they are snuggling up while facing each other like that.

I read it.
I read that you are having a hard time. I don't know the details of you or everyone, or your circumstances, but it really conveys your painful feelings. I understand your feelings from the bottom of my heart.
As other monks have already answered, commandments do not have to be given from generation to generation.
Each person's situation will also change, and it also depends on that person's faith. There are also differences depending on the family temple and denomination.
Also, depending on the temple, whether or not you receive an offering in order to bestow the commandment name also changes. Incidentally, I did not receive any gifts when bestowing the commandments. That's because our temple doesn't have any kaima fees. We also receive donations when attending memorial services and funerals to the extent possible.
So you don't even get into debt and receive alms.
Since it's my name as a disciple of the Buddha, I think it's fine to the extent possible.

You don't have to force yourself to have a funeral when you're in debt. First, please discuss with the Life Support Division of the government office where you live that there are no funeral expenses. Depending on the local government, there is a funeral assistance system, and the local government directly pays expenses to the funeral home. Note that in this case, there are many cases of direct cremation (direct burial) without a funeral. Also, since there is no money for a funeral at the temple, please ask the government office and ask if it's OK if it's OK if it's okay to just do the cremation with funeral assistance. Depending on the temple, why don't they do bone burials (including sutras) at temples? I think they'll suggest something like that. It's not normal to ask for donations until you're in debt. Please tell the temple about the situation as it is. Taking consultations is also a temple job, isn't it? Please never get into debt.

If I were a parishioner, I would attend a funeral even for free when a parishioner dies, and I would also give him the commandments.
It's the least a form of mourning that can be done as a Buddhist monk or temple.
However, when acquiring a new graveyard at a temple, there is an amount set by the parishioners general meeting.
This is an organizational rule, so it can't be helped.
Also, something like an annual temple fee is required every year. This is also a necessary burden since expenses managed by the Danke's accountant are “split”.
It's the same as club fees for club activities.
It's just our temple system, though.
Well, Buddhism teaches to reduce the causes of worry, suffering, and stress.
I think that if you learn and practice Buddhism, there is a possibility that you will get rid of your debt habit.
There are many joys in life other than what money can buy.
If you learn Buddhism, you may be able to develop a personality that makes you feel happy enough in your life within your income range.
Note, in the Jodo sect, with or without debt, with or without a commandment,
Namu Amida Buddha
It is explained that anyone can pass away in the Pure Land of Paradise if they chant Nembutsu.
The Buddha's mercy won't abandon you or your family, so don't worry.