Boyfriend pretending to be single

Thank you for your consultation. The act of betrayal from someone who believed and even pledged naturalization and cohabitation, and the suffering where hope for the future was taken away in an instant is indescribable. My depression worsened, and the situation of simply surviving every day really hurt my heart. What he did is never permissible, and it is also a legitimate right to consult with experts such as law terrace and pursue legal responsibilities such as alimony claims against annulment of engagement. However, now taking care of your own mind is a top priority above all else.

In Buddhism, there is a teaching called “impermanent behavior (shogyomujo).” Everything in this world changes, and nothing stays the same forever. It's terribly cruel that the future dreams and promises I talked about with him have become an illusion, but if you continue to be held captive by past events that cannot be changed, your suffering will increase even more.

Also, it is natural that my heart seems to break when I compare it to “only my partner is back to normal, and I am the only one in this pain.” However, as the phrase “causal retaliation (cause and effect)” suggests, true happiness will never return to him who deeply hurts people and lives a way of life full of deception without a shred of sincerity. The rewards for misdeeds always go to the person himself/herself. So, there's absolutely no need to envy his superficial “way back to life” or lose heart by comparing him to yourself.

In order to reach a day where you think “I'm glad we broke up,” the first step is to gradually take your gaze off of abominable events in the past and let go of your obsessions and obsessions. Please don't force yourself to look forward now, and take good care of yourself just by saying, “I managed to survive today.” By letting go of your sorrow and resentment little by little over time, new light will once again enter the gaps between your hearts.

You're still young in your 20s, and your real life is about to begin. Once you have been completely freed from this bad spell and have regained your own mental health, a “true good relationship” that is sincere and truly cares about you will surely come around. Please don't be impatient and spend your days caring for yourself the most now.

worship
Engiji Temple Shakujo

　Everyone, there were a lot of painful things. Please take care of yourself. So what should I do to forget the painful things?
The best way is to keep busy. I'll try not to think about that. Why don't you start by cleaning your room? Clean the room at regular and fixed times. Finally, today's toilet today I'm going to decide on a bath and place and clean it. If you finish it all at once in 1 day, the next day will be fine, so decide the location little by little and clean. Then, do zazen meditation. How about repeating this every day? As a result, I spend less time thinking about the extra time. Organize your head. However, not everyone is helpful. I suggest this method. If you think it's not right for you, don't overdo it and look at other monks' answers and refer to them. That's all for me.

I read it.
I read that you are having a very difficult time right now and that your illness has worsened. I don't know the details about you or that person, but I understand your painful feelings from the bottom of my heart.

First of all, please take care of your own mind and body. Please leave that person alone and take care of yourself and heal them.
What that person did was a lie, it's a crime, and that person hurt you deeply, so it's a bad relationship. Let's get rid of bad relationships once and for all. suchlike
The first thing to do is break ties with foolish people and live peacefully every day.

You are still living well now, and you are still living with many blessings.
There is no change that you are a very precious and important person.
Please try to live every day peacefully and slowly.

I think it's okay to ask a lawyer to sue that person. I think that person committed fraud. As Shakushi said, I think it's okay to ask for a response without consulting the Law Terrace or the National Police Agency.
https://www.npa.go.jp/bureau/safetylife/sos47/case/sns-romance/romance/
https://www.houterasu.or.jp/lp/danjo2022a/
Nonetheless, I think it's okay for you to stop getting involved at all.

I sincerely pray that you will be able to get away from such bad relationships and live every day with peace of mind, and that you will be able to survive by sharing happiness while helping someone you really care about. We wholeheartedly agree

I'm really glad you were able to break up with your boyfriend.
You wrote, “My partner is back, I can't get back to normal,” but that's not true.
My boyfriend will definitely be rewarded for his misdeeds from now on.
On the other hand, there is absolutely nothing wrong with you, so true happiness should await next.
You have suffered a huge wound in your heart, and that wound will surely heal over time.
If you're young, it must be a blink of an eye.
When it comes to depression, it may be best to get treatment from a specialist, but as a monk, I recommend zazen (or meditation).
I don't think there's an easier or more effective way to get rid of bitter memories from the past from your head.

that's a terrible story, isn't it? Haven't we talked about money this far?
What he did was marriage fraud. I disdained your feelings, deceived them (and as a result, deceived them), and mentally drove them. Then, they said goodbye because they wanted to go back to their family. It's enough to claim alimony.

However, you'd better not get involved with him. Even in the previous question, there were people around you who were worried about you. There are people who think of you. The people around you are on your side who understand you. They will continue to support you.

Let's cut all contact with him.
If you cut it out just now, he's back to normal, and you might think you've lost it, but even if you walk with a guy you don't trust, your life would have been ruined.

He wasn't right for your life.
Your life is yet to come, and you haven't lost anything yet.

Let's paint a future with people who care about you.

Everyone, a lot of things have happened between 1 month ago and now.

Thank you for writing about the current situation here, despite having a really difficult experience.

I wasn't able to say that last time, but after all, I think breaking up was the right answer.

Unfaithful people don't change because their sexual roots are rotten.

I'm glad I broke up with such a scum.

Let's break up bad relationships.

Really, I'm glad they stopped living together.

Since we lived together, I've learned about my partner's misdeeds, and I'm still traumatized.

There may be fog right in front of you right now, but a clear day will always come.

Time will solve the problem little by little.

There are also kind people who are kind enough to pay attention to everyone.

Whether it's your friends or family, someone like that you can proudly introduce yourself to in the future will always appear.

Definitely.

Let's start by reinventing ourselves.
The first thing to do is keep busy without thinking about anything.

Take a deep breath, bathe in the light of the fire if possible, eat, and sleep.

Before going to sleep, burn incense and meditate.

Also, I just want you to keep this one thing you can't do next.

Don't let them control your life.
I don't let my partner take charge of my life.

I won't give up my comfort zone or base to anyone.

I live a life where I can say that I am happy enough, even if I am alone.

By doing so, what you look for in a partner will change.

By the time we can do that, strange people won't come by.

I believe and believe that everyone who is kind hearted and faces themselves properly can do this.

Also, I will be thinking of Mi-san the whole time, and I will accompany you, so don't be desperate, don't give up, and take good care of yourself.

If it becomes difficult again, please let me know.

I'll always be there for you.