School is hard

It's hard to go to school, especially to the classroom.
The members of the class are almost the same last year and this year, but since last year, they have been avoided by a group of 7 girls.
It's still fine if it's simply being avoided, but they are secretly speaking ill of me when they look at me from afar.
It's also said when you're nearby.
Not all 7 people are saying it, but specific people out of 7 people, 2 or 3 people (the leader and 2 people who are particularly close with the leader) are saying it, and others are laughing when they hear it.
The content is about making a fool of me and how to avoid me.

For example, when I was drowsy during class due to lack of sleep, two particularly secretive people in nearby seats looked at me like they made a fool of me and smirked as if they had made a fool of me.
Those people are clearly sleeping because they want to sleep in class, and they sleep even when they don't want to sleep, so I'm wondering why they can make a fool of people even though they're sleepy during class.
Also, in physical education at my school, I stretch out with a set pair of 2 people nearby during the first exercise in class. When someone is taking a day off, they line up for that person, so sometimes the people in the pair change. So, there was quite a bit of time off in class last winter, and I ended up teaming up with the leader, and I was making noise in the classroom during the break about what to do.
Even though I was in the classroom, I was speaking in a voice I could hear.
In the end, I decided to observe the day's physical education, so I didn't team up with the leader or group members.

Club activities are fun, so until now I've been going to school for club activities, but recently I've retired from club activities, so it's really hard.
I don't want to go back to school, and since I want to go on to college, I don't want to have much influence on my future career path, so I have to go to school, but it's hard because I'm secretly told about it every day.
I try not to worry about it as much as possible, but I've always been depressed because I'm the type that really cares about someone's words and actions, and it's very easy to be disappointed.
I would like you to tell me what kind of behavior and attitude I should do, what I should look forward to when I go to school, etc.

5 Zen Responses

This is admirable “bullying” (psychological violence)

I read it. I was exposed to the gaze and words of my surroundings on a daily basis, and I was able to endure it really well in the classroom where I couldn't rest. I would like to express my sincere respect for your seriousness and strength as you have finished supporting your club activities and stepping up for your career path.

In Buddhism, there is a teaching of “cause and effect (cause).” Acts that humiliate others and laugh at them will eventually go around and cause them to suffer themselves. If they look down on you, it's just selfish behavior to fill their immaturity and anxiety, not because you are at fault. Originally, there is no need to be hurt by unreasonable malice.

However, you don't have to endure it alone. This is admirable “bullying” (psychological violence). Please quietly record “when, who said what” in your notebook. Objective records are reliable evidence to protect you in times of emergency, and are a great source of power for reliable parents and teachers to take action. Let's ask the school to take firm measures, such as strict precautions.

Even so, if the environment hasn't changed and suffering continues, there are ways to protect yourself without giving up on your career path, such as transferring to a correspondence high school. The most important thing right now is to protect your heart and life.

Classroom relationships are just a small corner of your life. Please cherish small “time for yourself,” such as favorite hobbies and future dreams outside of school. There isn't just one path. Please talk about the inside of your heart again whenever it becomes painful.

Worship
Engiji Temple Shakujo

Thank you for your question.
There are people like that everywhere, right? I'm in trouble.
It seems that even Buddha from 2,500 years ago was whispered ill of alms and cursed in a loud voice. But the Buddha said, “I don't accept that bad talk. I'll return it to you.” It seems that he was chanting it in his heart. If you don't take bad words, they will go back to the person who said them. Even if they say “stupid,” the word “stupid” comes back to the ears of the person who said it if they don't accept it. So just like the Buddha, you also said in your heart, “I won't accept it. I will return it.” It would be nice if you chant it.
You can do physical education and preparatory exercises alone. When the teacher said, “Do it as a pair,” she said, “I don't care, but ○○-san doesn't seem to like me, so I'm going to do it alone. Everyone has likes and dislikes, so please don't pay attention to ○○-san.” You can say that and do preparatory exercises alone in a dignified manner.
Not going to school for 2 to 3 people with bad personalities is a waste, it's annoying, and I feel like I'll regret it for the rest of my life. If it's violent bullying, theft, or bullying about money, you should immediately consult with your teacher, school counselor, or parent, and if that doesn't work, you should report it to the police, but I don't think it's that bad yet, so I think it's better to go to school with a challenging feeling that “you won't lose to these guys.”
Also, I think watching comics, anime, and dramas about bullying (with stories that don't give in to bullying) about bullying, such as “GTO” and “Life,” gives me courage.
Also, I think it's a good idea to increase the number of allies by increasing conversations with children other than those 7 people as much as possible. I think it's also good to get energy from juniors by supporting juniors who are working hard even after they've retired from club activities, and helping if there's anything they can do.
Also, since it is said that they want to go on to college, I think it is important to listen carefully to the classes and ask classmates and teachers what they don't understand to steadily improve their academic ability. It's a good idea to consider what kind of work you want to do in the future when choosing where to go to college. If you set a time to surf the internet and concentrate on studying at night, leave your smartphone with your parents.
Also, even if you have a chance to talk to that bully, don't be afraid and treat him calmly like any other classmate without being afraid or angry.
I'm rooting for you.

Let's talk about it as soon as possible

I read it. I read that you are having a very hard time. I don't know the details about you or the people around you, but I can tell you that you are having a very hard time. I understand your feelings from the bottom of my heart.
Please tell your school teachers and parents about it as soon as possible. Please tell me clearly that you are struggling and having such a hard time.
What those kids are doing is clearly bullying and harassment. But let's talk to parents and teachers and ask them to sincerely apologize to you so that they can correct what those children are doing.
If you can't get immediate response, talk to the consultation desk of a public institution right away.

https://www.mext.go.jp/a_menu/shotou/seitoshidou/06112210.htm

https://childline.or.jp/

https://www.moj.go.jp/JINKEN/jinken03_00282.html

I'm sure many people will accept your thoughts and help you. You can go to school with peace of mind without being bullied or harassed like that.

I sincerely pray that you will be accepted by many people and that you can go to school with peace of mind without being bullied or harassed, and that you can work hard on your studies and grow well with many children.
And I wholeheartedly support you. We wholeheartedly agree

Friends who can complain (going to a cram school, etc.)

For example, is it possible to have fellow club members in different classes listen to complaints “this happened in class”?
There are times when you feel relieved (gasped) just by having someone listen to you.
For example, if they can afford it financially, they will use the entrance exam as an excuse to go to a cram school.
If you get close enough to chat with kids from different schools at a cram school, you can get them to listen to their complaints, and there are times when friends outside of school are more comfortable talking to you in the first place.

You don't have to hold it alone. Because there's nothing wrong with you.

Well, I'm worried. Besides, that group of 7 people is really disgusting...
It's sad and it hurts. Of course I don't want to go to school. This is bullying. It's violence against you.

Tell your parents and teachers. Being warned by teachers (adults) is a great deterrent. Also, don't put up with this kind of behavior for a long time; it's better to move as soon as possible. It's unreasonable and takes courage for victims to act, but if they don't issue an SOS, the situation will continue. So, let's put out autographs around us.

You don't have to hold it alone. Because there's nothing wrong with you.

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