What does it mean to suffer at the end

I'll never forget the painful face of my father who passed away.
Even from the place where it is said that “his face has changed,” I can imagine that father's physical suffering was severe.
I presume that it is extremely plausible that regrets about prolonging the father's physical suffering remain, as a parent-child feeling.

One person said, “Death is the last human education.”
I'll show those who are left with a dying figure.

I think it contains the meaning of how to die with an expression of anguish on your face, and how to die with a peaceful smile on your face, showing the reality of “death” to those left behind, and learning something from it.

As you may be concerned, your father passed away due to unbearable physical suffering.
However, I think that means I've shown you the reality of “death.”

As opposed to putting death makeup on the face of the deceased before the funeral, relaxing the muscles, and making the face look peaceful,
He filed an objection saying, “We must properly show the reality of death.”

Certainly, if it were to be said that he passed away with a peaceful face, people around them would feel relieved and relieved.

However, it's just something made, and isn't it supposed to bend the will of your father, who was trying to tell you something through something called “death”?

Why don't you take the fact that your father suffered as a fact.

On top of that, think about what your father told you through “death.”
I think your regret is an expression of your father's message that you should definitely learn from “death.”

Dear CML

This is Kawaguchi Hidetoshi. This is a humble answer to the question.

I would like to express my sincere condolences for your father's passing away.

The content makes me think about how to end a life that everyone can't avoid... how terminal medical care and terminal care should be.

In modern Japanese Buddhism, there is an activity called “vihara” that is being worked on about end-of-life nursing and end-of-life nursing.

http://ja.wikipedia.org/wiki/ビハーラ

As such activities spread, it would be truly a happy thing if a peaceful end was reached beyond the four pains of life, old age, illness, and death, but it is also certain that reality is quite difficult when it comes to oneself and one's immediate family.

Also, when dealing with the death of someone they love in reality, everyone wants them to be still alive, and naturally struggles to do something about it. Even though these acts are impermanent, they are actually nonexistent.

The pain of being blamed on yourself, saying, “Couldn't you let them pass away sooner...” and I'm sure there are people who cared for their loved ones in similar situations, big or small.

While the development of medicine brings benefits to the cure of diseases, the adverse effects of not being able to cause natural death so easily have also occurred, and I think the merits and demerits of progress and development...

Like the late Kaneko Tetsuo, a recent distribution journalist, I also know that if each person can understand, prepare, and prepare for their own “way to die” in advance as soon as possible, they may be able to ease and heal their own “suffering” and the “suffering” of the bereaved family.

“End of life”
http://ja.wikipedia.org/wiki/終活

What exactly should Buddhism do in order to heal and destroy the “suffering” of all sentient beings? This is truly the biggest issue for those involved in Buddhism that should continue to be addressed.

By all means, since CML can face up to the reality (suffering) of the “suffering” of life, old age, illness, and death this time, I think it would be a good opportunity to think about what exactly is the cause (collection) of those “suffering,” whether that “suffering” can be destroyed (destroyed), and what methods (ways) to destroy that “suffering” (suffering) are there, so it would be a good opportunity for them to learn about the Buddha's “Four Holy Traces” I know it.

Kawaguchi Hidetoshi Gassho

It seems that a woman who lost her beloved family due to the Great East Japan Earthquake and was living days of utter self-loss, was told the following by her doctor.
“Please ask so there are no misunderstandings. It sounds cruel, but families who have passed away can no longer enjoy or rejoice.”

“...!?”

“... but please listen carefully.
... I won't suffer or feel any more pain.
I've been freed forever from pain and suffering.
Please feel better as soon as possible...”
It seems that the doctor's words woke me up with a feeling of “ha.”

The woman said that her family who died “may be suffering all the time now.” I kept thinking about it for several months, and I was tied to myself with a rope of suffering.

Furthermore, I have come to realize that what has continued to torment me ever since the earthquake was not the earthquake itself or the death of a family member itself, but my own thoughts (self-conviction) of mourning, worrying, and blaming myself for the death of my family.

The stronger a person's feelings for those they love, the stronger their ability to tune in to the suffering of those they love.
That thought penetrates into your own heart, where it is different from the person who is suffering from time to time, and it is aroused that you want to replace them.

Strictly speaking,
① The physical pain and mental suffering of the father who passed away,
② It's different from your own suffering.

② Thoughts that arise when you keep thinking about your father's predicament yourself,
① Please think again carefully that the pain your father endured during his lifetime is strictly different from the pain he endured during his illness.
If you do that,
“What should you do now”
I think I'll be able to hear another new message from my dad.

Please come back to your senses as soon as possible.

To CML

Dad's last word shows the current state of medical care
I hear that there are many people who feel the same way.

The Buddha said, “Life is painful.”
That's exactly what a father showed while living, and showed it to the end.

Please stop blaming yourself first.
Dad probably doesn't want it.
In the midst of that painful life,
I'm sure your father wants to have some fun and be able to live your own life.

I've had enough time to face my father's death,
You've probably had a lot of experiences.

From here on, please think about yourself first. Gassho